Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Mar 2017 12:34 AM · For: No Love Lost

Hello again! 

 

Ah. So here we are. 

 

Millie is emotionally unavailable and so she's dumping poor Rex after a single date. I do think it's odd that they'd even have to have a break up after a single date. I feel like where I come from, you sort of have to have been dating for awhile before that's warranted, but I'm really splitting hairs here. Anyway, so she's emotionally available and she seems to burn through guys just as fast as Sirius is burning through chicks.

 

Now to Sirius. I do find it a bit cliche that he's all shaken up about being dumped, but I can move past that. Overall, I enjoyed seeing his confident, sort of playboy attitude shaken up a bit. 

 

Remus' assessment of him sort of seems to hit the nail on the head so to speak. I also love that it's Remus who has the idea for the prank, not James or Sirius. I feel like all too often, he gets portrayed as a complete goody two shoes, but I have to imagine that as one of the Marauders, he must have a wild streak in there somewhere. 

 

~Kaitlin

Author's Response:

 

They're seventeen. Even single dates mean something. And it's different for everyone, I guess. I think it's still polite to let someone else know that you don't really see them romantically. And yes - emotional unavailability is something both Millie and Sirius have in common, which is rather unfortunate.

 

Some people take rejection better than others. I've always seen Sirius not being very good at failure, since he was born into privilege and is of above average intelligence. And again, he's seventeen. Emotions are running high, and everything is larger than life.

 

Remus is one astute person - except when it comes to romantic feelings directed towards him, of course. And I bet Remus' wild streak is a mile wide!

Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Mar 2017 12:21 AM · For: The Deeper Things in Life

Back for another one! 

 

Ahh. So the fabled meeting between Sirius and Millie. I feel like it went about as well as I expected it to. But seriously, who asks someone who's parents have been murdered if they miss them much. Seriously? That's the worst line/fake compassion ever. No wonder Millie hates him. I think I would too. 

 

I love how brutal Millie is in dealing with Sirius. She shuts him up pretty quickly and makes him well aware that she's not interested. 

 

Of course, since the two of them seem to mesh as well as oil and water, I have the feeling that they're going to be forced into some sort of shenaniganry together. I sitll can't quite fathom how Sirius might convince Millie to join one of his hairbrained schemes. 

 

~Kaitlin

Author's Response:

The fabled meeting! Finally! To be fair to Sirius, knowing the social protocol around mourning is pretty tough. Although, as far as casual chitchat goes, he may have gone too intense, too fast. I've always thought that his sympathies were genuine, just rather misplaced.

 

Millie just has no time for him. She has better things to do, honestly. Like concentrate in Potions class.

 

Shenanigans are coming! Of course, they are all of Sirius' making, and therefore, flimsy at best. Such are the charms of Sirius Orion Black!

Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 08 Mar 2017 12:17 AM · For: Have You Even Talked to Her?

Hello again! 

 

Back for the next chapter! 

 

I love that everyone is so dumbfounded by Millie and Remus' conversation. I mean is it really that odd that the two of them spoke politely to each other? Remus seems the type to be into books, so I think it's fitting that he'd notice what Millie was reading.

 

I also really liked how you started to show the way that James is evolving in terms of his infatuation with Lily. All too often, when people write Lily/James it's this weird sort of love at first sight thing where Lily really loved him all along and they sort of skip over any evolution of the relationship. It's nice to see that you've included parts that show him making an effort to be a better guy for her. I can also see the moments where maybe, just maybe, her mind is starting to change a little bit. 

 

Poor Sarah and her infatuation with Remus. Knowing how thick he was about Tonks and her feelings as an adult, I feel like it's going to be pretty tough for her to get through to him. 

 

I'm looking forward to seeing how Sirius and Millie's first interactions go. 

 

~Kaitlin

Author's Response:

It is not odd at all that Millie and Remus spoke. They are simply surrounded by idiots :P Some of those people are also a little jealous, too...

 

I can't see Lily as a love at first sight type of person. Also, James is not that great when we see him at age fifteen. It is far more plausible to me that he really had to mature before Lily even thought to give him the time of day.

 

Whatever Remus is like as an adult, I imagine it would've been fifty times worse when he was a teenager. Poor Sarah, indeed!

 

Thanks for the wonderful review, Kaitlin :)

Name: TreacleTart (Signed) · Date: 07 Mar 2017 11:51 PM · For: A First Time for Everything

Hey there!

Awhile back, I promised you a bunch of reviews on this excellent story. I'm here to start living up to that promise. Sorry it's taken me ages, but life has been keeping me occupied. 

 

So, oddly enough when I validated this story, I happened to really start reading it around chapter 6 or 7, so I thought I'd take a moment to re-visit the beginning of this and see where it all began.

 

i think this starts off nicely. You do a great job of showing the dynamic between Millie, Lily, James and Sirius pretty quickly. I like that James is interested in Lily, but not super overbearing at this point. It shows a bit of maturity on his part.

 

Millie easily comes off as the sarcastic one in the group, which I certainly appreciate. I feel like we could be friends. :)

 

Anyway, I'm off to the next chapter! I'll be back with more reviews in a bit!

 

~Kaitlin

Author's Response:

Hey, Kaitlin! Thanks so much for taking the time to read and review! Your little messages during validation were very flattering, so I'm very excited to hear your thoughts in more detail.

 

Ah, where it all began. Really, where my journey as a writer all began, too. These first few chapters are... well, they show that I'm a new writer, I think. Besides that, I'm still very proud of them. I wanted to get dynamics between characters out of the way relatively quickly, so that I could move onto changing them.

 

Millie is sooo sarcastic. Amazingly, I've written more sarcastic people than she. I'm pleased that you think y'all could be friends!

 

See you soon!