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Kaitlin!
Ah, oh my goodness, this was such a wonderfully cute and fluffy story and I'm smiling so widely right now - thank you for that!
So Eloise is one of my favourite minor characters, and I was really excited to see that you'd written about her, because there's just so much possibility with her character. You did a wonderful job (unsurprisingly) of bringing two very minor characters to life in this story, and making them seem very authentic and alive here.
I felt so sorry for Eloise at the start of this story. I know what it's like to be bullied, and you captured all of those feelings brilliantly. Pansy is just so unnecessarily cruel - though I did like the touch that you added which explained why she was being so mean and nasty to Eloise.
Seeing Justin standing up for her when Pansy was bullying Eloise made me smile so much - I really enjoyed seeing the bravery and chivalry there. We really don't know much at all about Justin, but he's in Hufflepuff and those traits definitely fit with what we know of him.
The conversation between Eloise and Justin was really sweet - I felt so sorry for Eloise that she had such low self-esteem, but I was glad that Justin made such an effort to try and make her see how amazing he is, and that he admitted his feelings for her. It was just so cute and fluffy and I loved reading it - I definitely wouldn't mind reading more of these two!
Sian :)
Hello, I'm here for a MAGIC task!
I feel so badly for Eloise. Most probably, it's because she's super relatable -- I know the feeling of trying to sneak by unnoticed, stealing out of a room and feeling as if everyone was watching me (and therefore judging me) when in reality they probably weren't even paying attention.
Valentine's Day must be a dreaded day for someone like Eloise.
Then, of course, there are the bullies. Pansy is such a terrible person in this, and you've done a great job with it, too. Bullies are bullies. Like, she's just being cruel to the poor girl!
I'm so glad that Justin steps in and stands up for her! I'm also really glad that he points out her self-worth when she's talking so negatively about herself. He's so sweet and patient with her, which is exactly what she needs.
With that kind of emotional trauma, on top of the bullying, she truly needs someone (even in a non-romantic sense) to help show her how to love herself.
And of course, the fluffiness of Eloise and Justin being together during Valentine's Day is absolutely squee-worthy! I'm glad she was able to go back to her dorm, look into the mirror and find love and acceptance for herself!
Excellent job!
Hey Kailtin, here for CTF & on jailbreak duty
Why do I get the feeling that even this is going to make me cry?
Oh wow I hate bullying so much. It’s still painful to even read about it, despite the fact that I’ve been out of High School for what – 7 years?? (has it been that long?)
UGH this makes me angry. I just want to do ugly things to Pansy. GO JUSTIN!!!! YESS!!! THANK YOU I LOVE YOU FINALLY SOMEONE IS STEPPING IN AND SHOWING PANSY WHAT HAPPENS TO BULLIES d84; d84;
Getting cheated on must be a pretty crappy feeling but it is NO REASON to mess with someone else. Nothing gives her the right to hurt other people. NOTHING.
And Justin is being so sweet and making sure Eloise is okay. There are not enough stories starring Justin. There are not enough stories starring Hufflepuffs now that I think about it. I love that he goes back to check on her later in the day. I wish someone had done that for me.
Oh dear, sweet Eloise! I feel this. Social interaction is a terrible thing. It gets easier though. It’s so so so great that Justin is trying and helping and making her more comfortable. A board game helps a lot too, takes off the pressure to talk and make conversation. And then it’s a childhood game too, one she’s really good at. That’s bound to help her feel less awkward.
Oh no now I’m crying. I knew that would happen. I hate when people think of themselves like that. I can remember what it was like and I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. I just love Justin for telling her how he sees her.
This is moving a bit too fast for comfort tho. I love that you have her believing him so quickly and everything that happens after that but I feel like there’d be several weeks before this happens.
Maybe a hug or something would happen first. And I wish you’d kept her with acne and not looking perfect. Because even if your skin isn’t awesome you deserve to be loved and appreciated and to not be made fun of.
Don’t get me wrong, I like your perfect fairy tale ending but in reality it would probably be different (unfortunately I speak from experience)
This was a great read though. Thank you for writing something like this, there aren’t enough stories like that out there.
Xoxx Anja
Author's Response:I know the ending on this is a bit too good to be true, but sometimes it's nice to imagine a world where those sort of things happen. Thank you for another lovely review and for all your support and encouragement! <3
Well hello, Kaitlin! I hear there's a flag hiding out amongst your stories. Will we find it? Probably not, but here goes.
The title of this story certainly caught my attention. Immediately, I wanted to jump to Eloise Midgen's defence and shout something about appearances being merely skin deep and nobody is truly "ugly", because we all know Eloise from JK Rowling's stories as the girl with the horrible acne. I always felt bad for her; we saw so little of her in the books and all we really knew is that she suffered from common teenage spots.
I can imagine how painful Valentine's Day must have been for Eloise to have to endure year after year, especially if all her friends go on dates, or have no trouble attracting partners.
Gosh, I know Pansy was cruel, but really? Her digs at Eloise are just excruciating and I am practically crying for the poor girl. I am so glad that Justin Finch-Fletchley came to her rescue and gave her some moral support. How thoughtful of him! It never occurred to me that he may have had an ulterior motive for doing so, but I'm so glad to see that someone has looked past her appearance and is interested in the person underneath the skin.
Eloise's acne has long-gone, but the emotional scars from physical aspects can often run deep, making people feel "ugly" when they never were in the first place, can't they? In a way, I almost wish you'd left her with a few spots, and that Justin had fancied her for herself, and disregarded her appearance? However, I suppose it's nicer for Eloise to no longer have spots.
This was a really cute one-shot and I'm glad I read it!
Brax X
Author's Response:Hey there! Thank you so much for the review! It truly made my day! I wish I could write you a longer response, but I've gotten so bogged down in review responses lately. I hope you know how much your words mean to me and how much I appreciate your support, encouragement, and critique. Thank you!
~Kaitlin
Hey, Kaitlin!
I'm here to drop off a little present for you. I don't know if the Holiday Wishlists are still going on, but either way, I had to leave a review.
I know you said that this was one of your oldest one shots, but I have to say I really enjoyed it. I've never really given much thought to Eloise Midgen and she's very much stayed in the shadows of the HP world for me, though I did feel sorry for her. To have your most defining feature to be your acne and to bullied for it is awful. Teenagers can be cruel. Acne is a completely normal thing that many teenagers have but - with what I've seen, at least - if the teen is a girl who isn't incredibly popular, people make out like it's absolutely disgusting. I know plenty of boys who everyone fancied, even with acne, and yet poor Eloise was tormented for it.
Reading her thoughts at the beginning hit me hard. When I was younger, I used to be bullied too so I understood completely how Eloise felt. Even if you're laying low, it feels like everyone is watching your every move, that every laugh is at you. You did a really good job of delivering the portrayal of a girl who has been bullied about her looks for ages, it was very believable.
Seeing as how I never gave much thought to Eloise, it's safe to say that I never gave much thought to shipping her with Justin either :P Either way, he was very sweet and patient and I think he's just what she needs. I'm glad she found someone who can make her feel good.
This was a lovely one shot to read.
xo
Author's Response:Hey Plums!
Thanks a bunch for the present! :D
Teenagers can indeed be jerks and poor Eloise seems to get the worst of it in cannon. I feel like the random mentions of her acne and off center nose by Ron warranted her own little story.
Definitely can feel really tough. I'm glad that came across in this.
I'm glad you enjoyed this!
~Kaitlin
Hi Kaitlin! I'm here for a holiday review binge. I saw that first on your wishlist was reviews on your stories here on HPFT so here I go. I'm excited.
Pansy is horrible. It's not like acne is something you can really do much about. Poor Eloise :( I just want to give her a hug. And I also want to punch Pansy in the face, because I'm a terrible Hufflepuff. I know Pansy is just projecting her misery onto others, and yeah it sucks that her boyfriend is messing around with someone else but that's no excuse for her to be a jerk to someone who did literally nothing to her.
Justin is really sweet and I'm glad he came around to help give Eloise her confidence. I love that they played chess and had their lonely Valentine's Day together so neither one of them was actually alone. Eloise's misgivings seemed very real, the thought that it was all a joke - I'm pretty sure I had that reaction to someone once when I was around that age! So I'm glad it turned out well for her, and for Justin. Sometimes it only takes one person noticing you to give you a huge confidence boost.
This was lovely and I adore reading about minor characters so I appreciated the fact that there were not one but two minor characters featured in this, and how you were able to develop Eloise into a much more three dimensional person than we see in the books. I am totally all about this new headcanon that Eloise is a chess genius.
Great writing, as always!
Author's Response:Hey Kristin!
Thanks for dropping by this story! And thank you for the holiday review!
Pansy is horrible. (I don't think you're a terrible Puff. I want to punch Pansy too.)
I did want there to be something sweet and innocent about Justin and Eloise. Justin really is just a tool for Eloise to finally see herself for who she is.
Yes! Spread the chess genius headcannon about Eloise! I headcannon that at some point she whoops Ron in chess after all the terrible comments he'd made about her acne.
Thanks again!
~Kaitlin
Kaitlin! Here for the December Review swap!
This was such a cute story. And as you probably know, I have a soft spot for stories about minor characters, especially when those minor characters are Hufflepuffs. And it was great to see a story that was set at Hogwarts, but didn't go into the war or anything like that - just kind of a normal time, even when Harry was at school.
Poor Eloise. I think everyone has dealt with a Pansy in their life, and it was so relatable and painful watching Eloise just stand there and take it. Pansy is the essential mean girl, and you did a great job with her, too.
Good on Justin, though! I'm glad he came to her rescue. TBH, I'm surprised other Puffs haven't done that in the past, but for the sake of the story, Justin is adorable and I love that he called Pansy out. She was probably prying on her own insecurities and latching onto poor Eloise.
Aww, Justin and Eloise are freaking adorable! I love that he spent the night with her, innocently playing Wizards Chess. And a National Wizarding Chess Champion! That sounds so cool! She should definitely start a chess club and kick Ron's butt at it. :)
I'm glad that this story was more about Eloise empowering herself with the side of romance with Justin. It worked very well here and you did a great job with their characterization, as it's something you quite excell at.
Excellent job, as always. <3
Author's Response:Hey Jill!
I have a soft spot for minor characters too!
Pansy is definitely a mean girl and I agree. Most people do deal with someone like that at some point.
I imagine other Puffs did stand up for her, but in this particular instance, Justin happens to be the person there.
I like your comment about a chess club and kicking Ron's butt at it. It's sort of my headcannon that Eloise whoops him at some point and puts him in his place after all the mean things he says about her. :D
Thank you so much!
~Kaitlin
Hi, Kaitlin!
Your story was so sweet! I haven't had a chance to read many of your one-shots, so I'm glad I stopped by. I have a soft spot for Justin. He features in several of my stories as an Auror. The way you wrote him made me happy. I couldn't imagine him being any less kind and compassionate than the way he treats Eliose. For her part, Eloise was a very genuine, realistic character. Her struggles with low self esteem and isolation are things that lots of people deal with. It was wonderful to see her open up to Justin and start to "rediscover" herself in the process.
Suggestions? Well, the kissing did seem to happen a little fast. Especially if I think of them as typical British boarding school students written in the JK Rowling style. That's the only thing, really. Otherwise, this was excellent!
Author's Response:Hey Dan!
I'm happy to hear that you approve of my portrayals of Justin and Eloise. I don't really know what inspired me to put them together, but once I did, it sort of became my rare pair OTP.
Ah, darn. There goes my American sensibilities again. I'll see if I can't figure out how to slow that down a bit when I edit this.
~Kaitlin
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