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Hiya! Here for more Inky reviews! Firstly, let me start by saying that I actually started reading Breathing Underwater during Inky noms and was planning to review it for the final event until it turned out to be ineligible, so I never got back around to it, even though it's brilliant so far what I've read and I will definitely be circling back to it after Inky's end! Anyway, I'm telling you all this just to mention that I do have a small idea of this universe, and I just love it. Although also I somehow never realized that one was going to lead to Snape/Ted, so this was exciting to see!
Onto this story then: Your writing is just so perfect for a cop fic in Chicago. Like you absolutley nail it, which is more of an observation for Breathing Underwater, but that same vibe transfers to here without missing a beat, even without cop things happening. I have no idea what has happened to his mother, but ah! His fear of leaving the hospital, his past breakdown where he first sees Ted, and his frozen state at the coffee shop are all such real responses to trauma and stress. And then the way you write his thoughts is just amazing, it has the vibe of canon Snape with the influence of Chicago police, it's incredible, frankly. And then Ted! Oh my goodness, is he just the sweetest marshmallow ever? Snape better be good to him! I look forward to more!
Author's Response:Hello hello!
Thank you so much for checking out both Breathing Underwater and More than Words!! Full disclosure, Sev/Ted are not endgame in Breathing Underwater. More than Words happens several years before Breathing, and they have both moved on (mostly) by the time Breathing Underwater happens. However, I do love their pairing a lot, and have some other story ideas for them that would give them a HEA.
I'm super thrilled that you're liking the style of the stories and Sev's narration! It's been a blast to explore this, especially since I never thought I would write something like this at all.
Thank you so much for reading and commenting!
Oh a Christmasey ending! Ahh I love the overall vibes of this chapter! Lol mildly drunk!Ted making dual snow angels so one isn't lonely...I absolutely loved how ridiculously adorable that was! And yay! Sev said I love you to him finally! I think it's perfect you made that happen in the last chapter. It shows that he's grown a lot and opened himself up to the possibility of love and intimacy because of Ted, so for it to happen here, at the end of this series, was such a great plan on your part!
And the way Sev comforts Ted about his dying patient. *pleading_eyes* Another illustration of growth and just being there for your person in a healthy supportive way! I also kind of liked how this chapter showed Sev comforting Ted in a similar way that Ted comforted Sev in the previous chapter.
You did such a great job with this series! This pairing is amazing and I can see why you made it as a finalist for the Inkys this year! :)
~ Courtney
I absolutely LOVE how you went about this prompt, Noelle! It was so incredibly heartwarming and such a unique idea! I don't think I've seen anyone approach this prompt like this! Even when neither one of them can really do anything to take the cancer away from Ma and/or easing her fragility, they still found ways to be one another's support.
And I love that Ted is a total Trekkie! Of course Sev is resistant to it, but willing to indulge him. That's the mark of a healthy partnership.
Will we get thanksgiving next chapter? I sure hope so! Another lovely depiction of this relationship!
~ Courtney
Noelle! Back again for the reviewing event!
Ahh I'm not crying, you are! I really love the running commentary you made about what it's like living in an apartment and being cautious about noises that will piss off the neighbors and such. And then Sev setting out to make the best dough to ensure they have a yummy dish for Thanksgiving just shows how much he cares about his Ma and how both of them want to make the best first impression on Ted's family. Also, as someone who is wholly ignorant on Chicago neighborhoods, you definitely show us a lot about the various socioeconomics of each in your story that doesn't hit you over the head with the knowledge, but is enough to understand there are distinct differences.
Another lovely drabble, my friend!
~ Courtney
“A god,” Severus panted. “You’re definitely a god.”
A beatific smile spread across Ted’s lips. “You make me feel like one.”
^^ ZOMG! *hearts_in_eyes* *pleading_eyes* I love them so much! Ahh...even the dialogue that leads up to that moment and then the after was so fitting and really added to the intensity of the moment. Ted's whole admission to...we're making adjustments to the apartment so we can do kinky sex things...was the best kind of outburst and I can see why that would have Sev turning him around and immediately getting on with the main event lol. Those are the best kind of outbursts that catch your partner off guard and add a level of unspoken excitement. I felt that in how quickly Sev acts. Great job at balancing the smut and emotions here!
~ Courtney
Haha omgawsh Noelle, I LOVE this chapter so much! it sweet and humorous and you also depict the feeling of heaviness one feels after a long ass day at work that you want to be over. But it's not SO heavy and tiring that Sev can't consider jumping Ted's bones hah. I absolutely LOVED the inclusion of the Brendan Fraser costume haha. It's a good look, especially for Ted. And I love that they're still in this phase of total adoration and obsession (healthy of course) with one another and it doesn't matter that Ted has to work in four hours because he's been waiting for this moment all night and he's going to seize hold of it! ;)
~ Courtney
"Severus waved back, because Ted didn’t like it when he was rude to strangers."
^^ Bahaha this made me laugh! Sev's trained so well!
And the twist that it was Gillian Anderson and how jelly Ted gets that Sev unknowingly helped her haha! I absolutely loved that whole exchange! And them looking at her in the parking lot..."the close yet so far," again had me chuckling.
Of course, I loved Sev's dark humorous thoughts about the grocery store too. Though it does lend itself to a bit of anxiety, which I can understand. Places like Whole Foods ARE totally overwhelming!
And yes, The Mummy gives off peak bisexual chaos energy for anyone who is a Gen X or Millennial haha. I love the idea of their date night and now I want bbq ribs hah.
~ Courtney
Oh, I am so glad we got some resolution to the whole incident with Lily and Sirius and the coming out! I think that was really important for you to capture that as a way for closure for Sev and to also show a way forward for Lily and his partnership.
I love how you describe Lily here. She embodies a similar kind of arrogance that The Marauders also possess and I think its important to acknowledge that it can be problematic and that those characters too, are flawed yet likeable. The ocean metaphor was a total *chef's kiss*
I also love a woman who can't cook. It should definitely not be assumed that that is the "wife's," role (hi, it's me, I cook to survive not for enjoyment xD), so I found that portrayal to be super uplifting and empowering.
Great job! As always, you do a fabulous job with morally grey characters, my dear!
~ Courtney
Ohmygod Noelle! This was such a beautiful chapter! I loved the contrasting stories regarding their scars. How Ted's story is one of mischief from his childhood and Severus' is one of trauma. It definitely fits their characters and explains why they are the way they are in a lot of ways. And Ted is so incredibly sweet about it, not prying, not apologizing, just loving and accepting and making Sev feel safe in spite of his past scars. That was so beautiful it made my heart melt! I was worried this might shift into angst, but I was so happy it didn't.
AND AN I LOVE YOU! EEP! Not only is it an I LOVE YOU, but it's an I LOVE YOU without any conditions and that makes it incredibly sweet!
Also, your descriptions of the heat were perfect. Nobody likes snuggles when your skin is melting and sticking to the sheets. You conveyed that so vividly. And loved the comparison of the window unit AC to The Little Engine That Could hah.
Lovely chapter, my friend!
~ Courtney
Well that was certainly something to wake up to hahaha. This was really hot! And while it was also very graphic, there was an emotive desperation about it that I think added to the allure. The moaning and thigh biting were pretty hard evidence to that. And I am also just UNDONE whenever someone says "let me look at you," in some way. Like there's a vulnerability to allowing someone to see you fully naked and giving them all the power in this moment. But it just shows how much they trust one another in this moment.
I found it amusing how they turned this into a game of sorts. And they're all about reciprocity, which feels nice when you have a partner who is all about that. :)
Anyway, another great piece of fluff with a heavy dose of delightful smut!
~ Courtney
P.S. I also appreciate the nods to save sex because that and consent are very important :) Nice rep there!
“Not everyone is as free and easy as you are. Don’t you ever get sick of coming out to people every time you date someone new, and they get amnesia you bat for both teams?”
Ted closed the book with a thunk. “Yes. I do get tired of it. But I’m not going to make myself smaller to fit in the brains of small-minded people. It’s hard work, but it’s worth doing.”
^^ Ahh I felt this deep within my soul. It's so hard to remind people what being bi is. But as Ted says, it's worth doing. And yeah, to make yourself smaller hurts even more.
I love that even though Sev's first inclination in this chapter is to just let Ted go, something inside of him shifts enough that he turns on the stereo and is like "dance with me?" I think that shows growth with his character here. Also, your previous chapter was the perfect set up for this moment and I loved that you brought back some of the banter here.
Also, Ma is so funny with her: "Don’t mind me! Between my earplugs, and my fan, I won’t hear a thing!"
Again, even in a serious moment, you manage to sprinkle in some humor!
And this: "Ted took Severus’s hand, and went right into Severus’s arms like he was made to be there."
^^ Daawwe, so sweet!
~ Courtney
Oh no, what's this, a little angst amidst the fluff?! Ahhh...coming out is such a delicate thing. I wish it could have gone better for Sev. But really, Ma and Ted both defending him was excellent. The betting would've been fun if Sirius, Lily, and Sev were all on equal footing as friends or like there wasn't a whole awkward mutual pining thing happening. But given the strained dynamic there, of course that conversation blew up the way it did.
I trust that Ted and Sev will make up and it will be everything I need it to be. But yeah, this chapter stung a little bit. Which again, testament to you as a writer to be able to drum up all that emotion in me.
Another great prompt application!
~ Courtney
The way you write humor in this along with all the romance is great. I feel like there were so many moments where I chuckled to myself. I also love that Ma is responding well to treatment and they're having a lovely little picnic in the park while they do the "meet my boyfriend thing." The scene was lovely, the banter hilarious. And Ted is adorable!
This was probably my favorite part: "Ted, being the smooth motherfucker he was, never got nervous." True! He seems to respond so well to human interaction whereas Sev can at times struggle with it. But that makes sense given the professions you've given to both of them in this universe.
I love how they balance one another out in spite of their differences! Opposites attract can kind of be a tricky thing, but here it looks so beautifully!
~ Courtney
Hi Noelle, here to leave some love on this story for the review event!
"The wheels of Severus’s roller skates shrieked bloody murder as he flew around the asphalt track, kicking up pieces of gravel under the hot July sun."
^^ OMG I CANNOT! Why is this image funny?! It just...I love it especially the "shrieked bloody murder," bit. You took a wildly fun image and made it suit Severus. And also making me chuckle right from the start lol.
I love that you went here with this prompt. A roller derby team with The Marauders?! I mean, the sport in itself is chaos...with them...even more so hah. I really loved the banter between Sirius and Sev and how there's not pure hatred there now. His jealousy with Lily is still palpable, but he's got a good thing with Ted and you can tell he's a loyal boyfriend and the pining seems to be waning and it's more of an annoyance at James being James.
Also the way you described the action of roller derby was superb! Excellent job with the descriptions!
Returning to this series was just what I needed this morning, so thank you for writing this!
~ Courtney
So Severus is a sucker for doe eyes regardless of the universe holding them, eh? Congratulations on another beautifully crafted story.
George
Author's Response:With all the emphasis on Lily's green eyes, I can't see it any other way. Severus is a sucker for a pair of fine eyes, whatever the universe.
Thank you so much for reading and commenting!
Noelle
Naturally your AP was the first one I hit up after finally getting back to FFT. I need a Sev fix *taps veins*
I adore this take on terms of endearment -- nicknames and pet names being used in all sorts of different ways and tones and relationships here. The Jam names. The way Sev's and Lily's Jam names complement one another (as well as being a great canon callback). The way Sev and Sirius needle one another with ironic pet names. Even the way Sev thinks of Ted as North Pond Cafe. :)
(Which is a great last line, by the way!!)
<3 Melanie
Author's Response:AHHHH thank you so much! I loved having Sev and Sirius needle each other here. And it was fun to throw around all the pet names, but have none of them be terribly serious.
Thank you so much for reading and commenting :D
Alright, and one more review, because I just want to have finished reading everything you have written so far xD
Aww this one is so precious! I wanna wrap it up in a Chicago Cubs blanket...and you did! ;) I like how more at ease they feel with one another in this moment. But there's still SOME tension because when things are new, you can go overboard with the PDA and stuff. That and, you don't want to make assumptions about labels and stuff.
I really like that you made Ted say it first. Because we get how uncertain and insecure Sev is, so for someone else to affirm it for him and then for him to doubly affirm it whenever got a little squirmy about it...so adorable!
I hope there's more Sned because I really love these two!
<3 Courtney
Author's Response:AWWWW, gosh! Thank you so much!! I love Sned too, so I'm definitely not finished with them :D
Hi Noelle! Here for your last review award from my challenge :)
Ahh...I loved your use of the prompt here! I could see the icing so vividly and I loved that it was a conversation starter for Sev and his Ma after she saw something that was very close to fireworks in the previous chapter hah.
But anyway, I thought you navigated this topic very well. Religion and queerness...well, I get you. It's very difficult to kind of navigate the two when one is bent on eradicating the other or making the other feel shameful or wrong. I think what you show here is a Mom who is imperfect, but trying, and caring. And that is something beautiful.
Because I think its important that even when you mess up as a parent, you apologize for it, and you let your kid know that while you might differ from them in one way or several, you love them, and you want what is best for them. And you did that in such a heartfelt way here.
When she reaches for his hand and he feels like lashing out, but then realizes, no that's what Dad would've done and I am not like Dad...gahh that got to me.
And then the end where she wants to meet Ted properly! It totally lightened the mood and made me laugh a bit.
Great job!
<3 Courtney
Author's Response:Thank you! Yeah, this was a thorny moment for Sev and Eileen. Eileen is serious about her religion, for all the reasons she lays out here, but she also seriously loves her son. So she's able to separate out what she needs from religion from what she needs to give her son.
I'm super proud of Sev how he decides not to act like his Dad.
Thank you so much for this lovely review!
Woah, what a heart pounding chapter! Oh my gawsh, I was not expected the "Ma walks in on them," twist. But right as soon as she called out, I was like OH SHIT. Because I remembered the part about her not knowing that he was bisexual.
So the lazy building against the backdrop of a thunderstorm is so great! It definitely creates this sort of lulling kind of mood for the reader...and then boom! My heart was pounding the whole time after the walk in moment.
And ahhh...gotta love the whole "you're gonna go to hell for being queer," line. But I mean, it makes sense coming from Sev's Mom in this moment. I am glad he shut her down though and was like "we aren't fucking doing this rn," because yeah, some debates/conversations should be saved for later. Like once the sweet af bf is gone.
And omgawsh I would've been Sev in that moment, regardless if it was my Mom or the other person's lol. There's just never nothing smooth or comfortable about being walked in on when you're in the middle of sexy times.
Another wonderful prompt, here Noelle!
<3 Courtney
6/7
Author's Response:I feel like the only reason Ted is able to be as calm and collected as he is here is because it's not his mom. This is hugely embarrassing, even if you have supportive parents.
Thank you so much for this lovely review!
*fans self* Ooh boy! That was certainly steamy!
It's amazing how much romances have changed. Whereas before, things like consent and whether or not you're engaging in "safe sex," weren't at the center of any steamy scenes. And now they are! It never fails to impress me how writers make including all of that necessary stuff sexy. And you do that here.
I also love how being so bare and vulnerable loosens their lips and makes them more willing to confess things to one another. It's both amusing, realistic, and adds to the element of "dirty talk," even when they both can't stop talking about each others dicks and/or how hot they find the other one. And then it turns sweet whenever they admit to enjoying cuddles.
Great job with this one!
<3 Courtney
5/7
Author's Response:You're so right about how romances have changed. Idk, I just think it can be super sexy when someone asks for conscent, especially when they already pretty much know they're gonna get it, such as here where Sev has been panting after Ted for however many chapters.
Thank you so much for this lovely review!
Ahh yeah, there is something that sort of breaks from a tension standpoint whenever you have to pause kissing in order to resume normal behavior. And then, gosh, if you aren't used to having to bring your clothes into the bathroom because you don't often have people there who might accidentally see you naked, it's an adjustment. And it works well in Ted's favor. Severus' too. :)
But you do a great job of building the tension right back up again. With Sev being like "deer in headlights," and Ted being so very comfortable with his half nakedness. But I really liked how there's that tender moment with the forehead press and the nose bumping. It definitely gives the impression that this is more than just a quickie for Ted. Which like, he's definitely more confident with this arrangement given how he essentially pins Sev down with his eyes and his sexy stalking and what not.
I thought this was funny: "If the fucking ‘L’ somehow jumped its tracks and came barreling through Severus’s apartment, it’d mow him down right were he was standing." But it also speaks to the feeling of being pinned down by someone else's eyes.
Anyway, this was a really good chapter with excellent build!
<3 Courtney
4/7
Author's Response:Thank you so much!!! Sev is all tied up in knots, especially here when he's broken the moment to clean up. Luckily he has Ted to get him back on track
Back again to check out some more of this series with some reward reviews!
And if I must say...ooh la la! This is a rather steamy "caught in the rain" moment! I really enjoyed the build of this. Sev's frustrations at the start have little to do with wanting to kiss the cutie nurse until they do, and I thought that was pretty brilliant.
Also the way you describe the kiss is very HOT! Like your descriptive words that show us how they're both attracted to one another, how they both look in that moment, how it all feels...it's just superb, steamy writing!
What a great fluffy moment! And a very nice take on a classic kissing trope! :)
<3 Courtney
3/7
Author's Response:AHHH Thank you so much!! That is definitely the affect I was going for :D
Hi there! I’m climbing up this mountain, and just HAD to come over here and leave words!
Except, you know, I’m going to struggle a little. Not because I don’t have anything to say, but because I think I don’t know what to leave out. This VOICE that you have going on here is just… I’m DYING every time I come back to this or Breathing Underwater because it has so much in it, just the voice is :chefskiss: and just, WOW, okay? It’s gritty and insanely personal, and I envy the way that you just get right into that head with everything all at once. It’s super immersive.
I can feel the signature frustration rolling off of this guy in tsunami waves. And he’s trying so hard to be outwardly apathetic about it, but he CAN’t, because inside, he’s so torn up. Argh!!! Tortured is a word I could use here. The whole thing. And with his mother and everything, it’s just so SAD.
Look, Severus. It’s really not a thing. People just need to cry, okay? And Asian American Brad Pitt has been around the block enough to know that crying goes better with Ben and Jerry. They will hand you tissues and give you a much needed sugar rush in equal measure. Take the hand.
Ok. I lied. I really have no words for how good this is.
I really love this thing.
Pix
Author's Response:AHHHH Thank you so much!!! This is maybe my favorite narrative voice I've come up with so far. I'm so glad it's coming off well :D
It means a lot that you liked it so much!
"May I kiss you?" / "Uh...yeah. That'd be okay." Oh, my! I adore them! :P <3
And such a great use of the prompt! Ted singing along to the radio while grilling is such a great image! And I love that Severus catching him in the middle of it didn't embarrass him at all! And again Severus can't keep his eyes off him, can he? :D They are so precious! <3
And... wow! Bisexual wake! If that's not a declaration of intent... :P Ted was actually much more straighforward than I'd expect him to, but that's actually nice, because isn't it terribly frustrating when characters just dance around things for way too long? :P
Side note: that dinner sounded awesome! But that's another show of how much Ted cares, right? <3
Another absolutely adorable one! <3 <3 <3
Author's Response:Thank you so much!! Ted is one to go for what he wants, which is good for Severus. The subtext is now text :D
I want to eat the dinner myself!
I love awkward Severus! It's just so cute! Love that he took a lifetime to decide what to wear, and all his doubts... is this a date? Is he flirting with me? could the subtext just be come text, please? So sweet! <3
And Ted, on his part, is as adorable as usual! Love the image of him savouring the shortbread while Severus stared... just too fluffy and perfect! <3
I feel for Ted, I'm a disaster with plants, too... and orchids are especially delicate, aren't they? But fortunately Severus knows what he's doing and how to fix it! How sweet is it that Ted called him "My hero"? <3 <3 <3
They are so adorable! I'm loving being back here again! See you on the next one! <3
Author's Response:Thank you! Ted is flirting so hard here and Sev has too much self-doubt to see it
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