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Hello, Noelle, my dear! Here to woo the reaper! :D
Aww... yes, I bet he was blushing! :P (Also, unrelated, but I agree with James, if they quit smoking, they'd have more breath for running... :P)
Poor Sev, still so infatuated with Lily even if he knows it can't go anywhere, but also so smitten for Ted at the same time... and how awkward it must've felt to be talking to him at the phone while having Lily so close... that's the second time he is in a similar awkward position, if I remember straight... but Ted called him, and that's what matters! At least something can come out for them, right? <3
Nice use of the prompt! What's more spectacular than the sun disappearing into an expanse of water, be it the sea/ocean or just a very big lake? (I'm sure it's equally beautiful, so... Who the fuck needed an ocean when you had this shit sitting in your backyard? Yeah, Sev, guess you're right... :P)
Great one! Made me smile! See you on the next in a minute! <3
Chiara
Author's Response:They should really listen to James, for real
Thank you so much for reading and commenting!
Ooh ok, so I wasn't expecting another Lily-piney chapter, but here we are! Anyway, I really love the direction you took this prompt. Getting lost in a graveyard gives off majorly creepy vibes, but your description makes it seem almost serene in a way.
And then the playful moment between Lily and Sev was really cute. Until he almost spiraled downward with his emotions for her. You do well with blending angst and fluff in this scene though. And then the ending with him needing to get laid made me chuckle. Poor Sev with all his sexual frustration...how do you manage to build up so much of that in less than 1,000 words. It's amazing, really.
This was totally enjoyable, Noelle!
<3 Courtney
Author's Response:Graveyards can be very peaceful, even though they are definitely creepy
The Lily pining is real. I wish Sev would get over it. But then, he wouldn't be Sev I guess
Ahh haha, this was so delightfully adorable! I love that while this is the first time Sev's giving a valiant effort in reading graphic novels, it's not his first exposure attempt with them. Which just makes Ted all the more special. :D So adorable.
Of course his dark humored commentary of them had me cackling. But we wouldn't expect anything less from him. One thing I really like that you do with these drabbles, is even when they aren't together, you still make me feel all kinds of things for Sev and Ted. The way Ted's on his mind makes me feel like they are right there together.
Another excellent chapter, my friend! I think the reaper would approve of this fine romance!
<3 Courtney
Author's Response:AHHH Thank you!
"And there Ted was again—burning up Severus’s standards until they weren’t nothing but the ashes of his good intentions."
^^ This is such a great line!
Ok, so I might be here to romance the reaper, but I am glad I can come back to this story! I really thought the way you handled Sev's reluctance to move forward with this relationship and Ted's reassurance that they move forward with it, really well. It definitely illuminates the differences between them, but also allows them to move forward together in a meaingful way.
In spite of the angst of what's happening with Sev's Ma, you made this into a very sweet drabble. It's nice to have someone there for you, who will care for you but also be honest. And it seems like Ted is exactly who Sev needs at this point in time.
<3 Courtney
Author's Response:Thank you! I agree, Ted is exactly who Severus needs at this moment in his life. If he'd just let it happen
Hi, Noelle!
Well. it's do or die. If the minotaur doesn't like this review, then I have no chance with him.
Poor Severus. I can feel him shivering in the cold wind. What's the wind chill factor? Something bad. Maybe someone will fire up the grill and he can stand next to it, propne or no propane. He'll have to buy himself a Sox blanket for future use, since it looks doubtful that this crowd will ever supply one during these game-viewing events. And the cold beverages from the minifridge aren't helping any to keep him warm.
Interesting to see you say that team pride is one of the main factors that keeps Severus from sharing Ted's blanket. Of course, you would know how strong team pride is in Chicago. Strong enough to freeze for? That, and modesty because Snape is not sure exactly how he stands with Ted. Official boyfriends? Or not? So Snape is unwillling to put himself out there by assuming that he and Ted are 'boyfriends' after six weeks of exclusivity, so it is Ted that has to broach the subject. This seems to be a sign of Snape's still-present feelings of not being good enough, his wondering whether anyone would really want him, flawed as he feels he is.
When he finds out that Ted does consider them to be boyfriends, Snape is so happy that he gladly nestles himself under the blue Cubs blanket. Team loyalty doesn't hold a candle to true love after all.
A cute and sweet story. I'm glad that things are coming together for Severus and Ted. Thank you for writing.
Vicki
Author's Response:The wind in Chicago can be just brutal, even on sixty-degree days that would otherwise be nice, and especially close to the lake like Wrigley Field is.
I think the pride is strong enough for Severus to freeze for. Maybe not other baseball fans, but Sev for sure.
Thank you so much for this lovely review!
Hi, Noelle!
Here to woo the minotaur again.
I'm glad that Severus eventually did come back to the house. What with the rain and the lightning (dangerous time to be outdoors), I suppose he didn't really have any other place to go, after having turned down Ted's offer. But it turned out to be a good thing that he stayed away for a little while because it gave both Severance and his mother time to calm down and think. Thus we end up with this lovely example of an almost-all-dialogue scene that works really well.
"It wasn't like Severus wasn't used to being hated." What a terrible reality, that he is accustomed to believing that he is hated. But until now, he had always thought he could count on his mother to not hate him, and now he thinks he's lost that.
I was surprised to read how quickly his mother apologized. Not saying that it was out of character for her (I don't know her character all that deeply), I just was surprised. The apology lines are really good because they are so realistic. Snape is feeling what he identifies as anger, but that's what men do. They shove all their emotions into two buckets, one labeled 'love/lust' and the other one labeled 'anger'. All the negative emotions (fear, shame, disappointment, guilt, failure, unhappiness, etc) go into bucket number two and emerge from that bucket clothed in the garb of anger.
Kudos to his mother for insisting on talking about what happened when Snape wants to nurse his anger by rejecting the conversation. Then he is angry and accusatory to her and to her church and to his long-gone father. A wonderful line, so true: "Snape closed his eyes, his anger till rumbling around in his chest, growling at him to lash out, to make the rest of the goddamn world hurt the way he did." I have seen that exact same thing in my own family when a family member (male) was deeply unhappy about something that was nobody's fault, just horrible luck, and he lashed out angrily at other family members unjustifiably.; it was obvious that he wanted to make them feel as unhappy as he himself felt at that time.
It was good to see that Seveus let loose of his anger when his mother was so positive towards him, no matter what he said, and explained to him why her church gave her strength in the face of her cancer. She sounds like a smart lady to know how to steer this conversation so skillfully, and then to turn it back to more mundane, less emotionally-charged subjects.
Was I wrong in thinking that this story was supposed to be a collection of fluffy chapters? (Just kidding.) Perhaps it gets fluffier towards the end, but I'm not certain that your Snape the Cop will ever be truly fluffy. :)
Great job. Will read the next chapter now.
Vicki
Author's Response:Thank you so much for this lovely review Vicki! I'm glad that Sev's anger/hurt came out naturally here
Hi, Noelle!
Well, maybe it's worth it to flirt with the minotaur if it means reading a great chapter like this one. Wow! I wasn't expecting this plot twist. I think I got whiplash from the sudden change in mood and focus.
Poor Severus. And poor Severus's mother. It's lucky that neither of them actually did have a heart attack.
Ted was impressive in how he acted as cool as a cucumber immediately after the catastrophic reveal. That guy has got his act together, instantly doing and saying the right thing. Of course, as Severus observes, it wasn't Ted's mother who was standing in the doorway.
A nice point you make -- that Snape's mother is not so sheltered that she doesn't know what bisexual is. At that moment I was a little confused -- if she's knowledgeable about sexual identity, then why is she so upset to discover that her son is not straight? But then you give us the reason -- she's worried about his immortal soul. He's not able to reassure her about the safety of his soul; he can only be sarcastic.. "Who died and made you God?"
Now he just wants to get out of there, leaving his mother in the midst of her shock and grief and fear. Did he really believe that she would never find out eventually? And after he walks Ted to his car, how long will it be before he can face coming back to the house? And will this event have a negative effect on his mother's precarious health?
Big can of worms. I must read on to see what happens next!
Vicki
Author's Response:This is a big can of worms, indeed
Hi, Noelle!
Here I am to woo the minotaur, although I'm not sure he's really my first choice for a date. :)
Given these two, it was bound to happen.
I like your opening lines that refer to the embarrassing Health 101 classes in high school sex ed -- how to take the ineffable joy of sex and turn it into a technical exercise. But the lesson seems to have sunk in anyway.
I also like the line saying that Severance had no porno plans invoving Ted or anybody else either. It means to me that his poor image of himself made him assume that nobody would ever find him that attractive; too bad he feels that way, and i expect that one glorious sexual experience will not be enough to dislodge that low self-opinion. Thus "There ain't no way you wanna be looking at me when you look like a fucking god."
I smiled to see the two reference to plants -- the Rose of Sharon that almost got knocked over (and you personified the plant because that's the way Snape sees 'her') and the orchid plant that apparently wasn't really sick. So even in a story about the extremes of passion you manage to remind us how much the plant world is a part of Severus's psyche.
You speak of "all the cracks in Severus's soul." A visual image, but it conveys so well how Severus sees himself. A good job in this chapter. It almost sounds like there's some hope for Severus.
Vicki
Author's Response:I think there is hope for Sev! At least I hope there is
Yessss another Sned drabble! *happy dance*
WHAT a fun use of the prompt on a roof! I love that Pomfrey has her own spectator setup from the top of her building. And watching Sev slowly lose it inside over having to watch his team losing while surrounded by the enemy is too fun. XD
Sports rivalries within a couple can be a lot of fun, the banter and the teasing can be great, and while I think some of Sev was just being a genuine stubborn prideful ass here, ultimately the rivalry ended up turning into foreplay (as it should!)
And that whole "I want to snuggle but have to act like I don't want to snuggle" was a really good analogy for this whole "are we boyfriends?" thing.
Can't wait for another installment!!
<3 Melanie
Author's Response:Sports rivalries in couples are super fun, especially as foreplay :D
AHHHHHHH Screaming. Again. Ted. Ted Tonks. What a guy. Such an icon. These two are freaking sugar and spice and everything right. I love them. I love this story. I hope you keep writing because I'd love to keep reading! <3 Amazing job with these prompts. Never the expected, but always so wonderful!
Author's Response:Oh my goodness, thank you so much!! And thank you for hosting this awesome challenge :D
I'm so speechless. This chapter was so beautiful. The way she apologized, but Sev stayed angry because she'd already said the thing. But she keeps at him - she tries to understand, tries to make him understand. And the way she describes her faith. I really really loved that with the setting you've placed these characters in. I'm screaming again. I've not stopped screaming since I started reading this story XD
Author's Response:AHHHH thank you so much! It's humiliating to apologize as a parent, but so important. I really wanted Eileen to be sincerely sorry here and I'm glad it turned out that way
The way I screamed NO at my computer through 90% of this chapter. I. AM. DEVASTATED. And Ted is such a good man. AHHHHH He's so fucking sweet and thouhtful and just UGH SEVERUS! I hate this. I hate that his ma said that. I hate that this is so real.
But I love that you're telling this story. Without filters or pulling punches. I also hate the title of the next chapter, but I'm going to hold out hope that we're only on prompt 16 so maybe things turn back around? They will turn back around. I'm going to manifest it XD
Author's Response:Thank you :')
In all the amazing smut that goes on in this chapter, it's so impactful as part of these characters too. And the way you write. NOELLE. You can't just throuh lines like he's 'filling the cracking in Sev's soul like he was meant to be there' and the idea of being like one of those math equations where the limit doesn't exist into such a sexy chapter. <3 <3 <3 I mean you can. Please do. Incredible.
Author's Response:AHHH Thank you so much!!!
Screaming. Again. Honestly that's the tweet. That's just me. Screaming at these two. So much fluff. SO. MUCH. FLUFF. Touching foreheads. The anticipation. AHHHH It's everything.
Author's Response:Touching foreheads is like my favorite thing in fiction, so thank you for the prompt!
Every chapter? You're really gonna make me scream in every chapter huh? lol I will repetivley say I love this story for every review without regret because it's true. Let 'em fucking look Sev! Get yours! The descriptions and metaphors you use are always so wonderful. The idea of 'ripping every secret' from his heart :heart eyes: and so many more in this chapter just lovely.
Author's Response:Thank you for screaming, it means the world to me :')
"I don't wanna hear anything after zombies" XD What a line. Incredible chapter. The way you lay out their history and add to their backstory so effortlessly (seemingly effortlessly). And the way Sev just scolds the reader XD I love the tone and approach to voice in this story so fucking much.
Author's Response:Sev breaking the fourth wall and scolding the reader is so much fun to write :D
Of course Ted has great taste in comics. He's an icon. The way you have Sev say 'noun-man' XD Such good levity in this story through Sev's specific tone and view of the world. Specifically in the way he tries to convince himself of things. That's such a human thing to do isn't it? To justify or explain things we think are wrong or out of place just so we can keep doing the thing.
Author's Response:Ted is an icon. Thank you!!!
I LOVE HIM. Ted is the standard. Straight up. What a legend. Love love love how Sev describes him. The cynical way he explain goodness and the distrust in good intentions. Ugh. This is so simultaneously heartbreaking and the warmest hug of a story XD <3 <3 <3
Author's Response:Thank you so much :')
AHHHHHHHHHH
I'm seriously obsessed with the way you can just drop me into a scene and I am fully invested. Favorite moment is the orchid blushing XD
Also though I really love how instant Sev answers the phone and is in son mode - I mean, I don't love it as a character trait, but I love how in-character it is of him.
Author's Response:AHHH I'm so glad you liked it! And the flower blushing too! I'm really enjoying personifying the plants in this story, and in the Breathing Underwater-verse in general. I just think it's a part of Sev's character that makes him sympathetic.
Sev's ability to code switch like that and shut everything out is so important to his character, I'm glad you noticed it!
Thank you for this lovely review :D
(msd xoxo)
Hahah! Whoop there it is! Well, almost. I love how Sev's like "I have standards but I'm not classy, at least not when it comes to this hottie patotie." That was super humourous to me.
And then shit! Awkward, clunky rolling around that leads to a head hitting a coffee table and a phone ringing...I love how you break through the tense build up of the sexy times. I totally winced at the realization that Ted hit his head, because who hasn't done that and/or can't relate to that hah? :)
Eep! The way the knuckle kiss and the hand squeeze brings Sev back from potential worry and/or spirally thoughts about his Mum...Ted's such a gem. We love him. And then being totally understanding URGHH...*cries about it*
I loved the combination of steamy and sweet here. You did that so well. :) Another great application of this prompt!
<3 Courtney
Author's Response:AHHH I'm so glad you liked the jokes at the beginning! Yeah, Sev is trying to have "standards" and be "classy" but Ted is way too hot for that nonsense, lmao
Okay, I love putting in awkward moments and such into sex scenes. Idk, it just makes it feel more real because rl sex can be full of awkward moments
Hitting your head on the coffee table SUCKS so bad
I'm so glad you liked the knuckle kiss! And Of course Ted would be understanding--if only Sev will let him do it
Thank you for this lovely review!
(msd xoxo)
Aww omgaaaawsh! Noelle, this is so heart warming and fabulous! I love how you took the approach with their first kiss! Cooking always brings this level of intimacy where you learn new things about the person you are doing it with or the person you are watch doing it. And in this we leaen that Ted is a very chic cook, but also a total dork with his unapologetic singing and dancing.
I also love how this scene slowly unfolds. I think that is the perfect pacing for a first kiss set up. The way you describe the branches in the backyard shielding them from the rest of the world and sort of encapsulating them in this protective cocoon. It's sweet and then the slow stroll that Ted makes to Sev before asking if he can kiss him ghduijndhdjfj...it's just such a great build up really!
I'm loving this series and it's so nice to be back!
<3 Courtney
Author's Response:I totally agree with you that cooking can be an intimate act. And Ted is going all out here with his preparations for Severus.
Ted is such a dork and I love him :D
I'm so glad you liked the bit about the branches!! I wanted the scene to have this very safe, protected feeling for Severus, so that he would feel okay about taking that leap with Ted.
Thank you so much for this lovely review :D
(msd xoxo)
AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ALL THE YES! FUCKING GO FOR IT TED TONKS YOU CLASSY FUCKER! <3 <3 <3 Okay. I don't have much more to say because it would all just be me repeating how much I love these two and their insane chemistry and Ted's amazing personality and Sev's hilarious internal monolouge. Just imagine me screaming at my computer and that's basically my review.
Also. I looked ahead at the titles of future chapters and now I'm sad, but have chosen to live in this moment forver instead. <3 Fluffy and steamy and Bowie <3
Author's Response:This is the moment when Ted goes ahead and whacks Sev over the head. Full disclosure: one of my favorite things in romances is when one person asks permission to kiss the other person. And I just feel that Ted would do that, because like you said, he's a classy guy :D
Thank you so much for this lovely review!
(msd xoxo)
First off, it's a truth universally acknowledged that forearms are hot. Thank you for recognizing this fact. XD Second, "could the subtext just become text" #Retweet and third AHHHHHHHH!!!!!! These two have such amazing chemistry. I love them so much reading these chapters is basically just me flailing around at the keybord XD
Also a big fan of the way he calls him nurse carebear. It's such a subtle way for Sev to keep a sort of distance between them. Like a way to tell himself he doesn't care and isn't close to him - that's such good character building. Another wonderfully teasing chapter <3
Author's Response:I'm so glad you agree with me about the forearms. I have no idea why they are hot--I only know that they are.
Poor Sev! He could really use some obvious text here. Like Ted just needs to whack him over the head here.
Yay! I'm glad you liked the Nurse Carebear thing. Severus in Breathing Underwater has a habit of giving everyone a nickname. It just started happening when I was drafting him. I hadn't thought of how this could be a way to keep some distance between himself and the other person, but I can definitely see that happening here. LIke he still kinda thinks that Ted is way out of his league, so he's trying to keep that distance so that it won't hurt as much if this "maybe date" turns out to be "no date."
Thank you for this lovely review!
(msd xoxo)
AHHHHHH!!!!! Another amazing chapter. I love this story. These characters are so real and so flawed in the best of ways. And Ted saying if you asks nicely :elmo fire: AHHHHHH <3
I've loved your approach to these prompts too. They're never the obvious route, but always make so much sense. And I love this AU you've built. It's so well done and has such a strong sense of place. Your nods to culture are always spot on. Love. Love. Love. Also - it's a date and I can't wait <3
Author's Response:That flirty Ted line was my favorite--I'm so glad you liked it!!!
And thank you so much about the prompts--I've really been trying to find a twist on them to make them a little unexpected.
I hope you enjoy Ted and Severus's "maybe date"
(msd xoxo)
I.AM.OBSESSED. Lily and Ted and Sirius XD XD XD What an awful and wonderful confluence of emotions. This was such a perfect chapter - so much is set up here so quickly and so richly. The slow burn is still simmering in the best of ways, then we toss in Lily for some spice and Sirius is there oogling Ted too XD All the ways Sev could be flustered and turned on and upset and ugh I just loved this. I love how messy it is. I love what the mess reveals about all the different characters.
Author's Response:This chapter was sort of fun to write because of all those conflicting personalities and emotions. Severus is all KINDS of tangled up inside, between his feelings for both Lily and Ted, and then his absolutel dislike of Sirius. And Sirius is well aware that Severus can't stand him, and he likes to needle Sev about it.
Thank you for this lovely review!
(msd xoxo)
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