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Hi Chiara! More reviews for the fairyland review event!
This whole drabble here is such an astute observation. Looking at someone in the princess's position, we all know it's one of privilege and she doesn't have the hardships everyone else has to endure, so it's easy to assume that her life is better -- that there's no reason to pity her, because she has everything. But the truth, as you point out, is that it's a double-edged sword, and being protected from everything means missing out on so many fulfilling experiences, so there is a reason to pity her. She gets whatever she wants, but doesn't really understand the value of it.
And I love the "true life is out there" part, because "true life" feels like a play on the phrase "true love," which is usually the subject of tales about princesses, and it just seemed very clever to play on the words that way!
<3 Melanie
Author's Response:Hi again, dear! :)
Yes, that's exactly what I was going for. The princess is obviously privileged in many ways, but having everything takes away from the (big or small) joys that make life worth living it and she'll never know them from her golden cage.
I didn't think about the "true life" as a play on the "true love" expression, although it's a very interesting thought!
Thank you so much for another lovely review! <3
Chiara! Here for the fairyland review event!
i love seeing what people can do with drabbles and I'm very excited to read yours with this theme!
This felt thoughtful and a bit melancholy and very powerful, particularly that last line. Because it's such a sad thought, that it's easier to hide yourself than to deal with the weird looks or questions or judgment of other people. But that's so often the case, that people do have to hide themselves, and it's easier to play along with the expectations. Because we really do have these expectations heaped on us by society, preset ideas about what's "normal," and things you're supposed to want, whether that's a partner or kids or whatever, and when you don't want the "normal" things other people definitely get weird and judgmental and hostile about it. And it can result in people feeling like there's something wrong with them, that they don't want the fairytale, or it's not for them, or maybe they want something like it but not exactly.
Anyway, this felt very raw and honest and I loved it. <3
Melanie
Author's Response:Hey, Melanie! Thank you so much for coming to this collection (and for all your praises, you were way too nice to me! <3 <3 <3)
This first drabble is a very personal one... yes, it is much easier to play along with the expectations, and it is kind of hurtful... and you do question yourself and think you might be "broken"... anyway, I'm so glad this came across well! <3
Thank you so much, my love! <3
hi chiara!! you've had a little break but now i'm back again for the winter in fairyland event :P
i was curious about this one because - though not unexpected in a drabble collection - it's got more reviews than others :P and ahhhhhh i love it! it reminds me of that brilliant german word 'fernweh', where you long for places far away from you, with all the longing and the wistfulness and the slight sadness that has.
but then this is a bit more productive than fernweh kinda is: the narrator actually goes. he leaves and he's so happy to have left - and i love that it really is this kind of soft, slow happiness, rather than a buzzing excitement. it's the satisfaction perhaps of doing something you've always wanted to do - finally! - rather than the excitement of something new and i love that hint to it: of having waited for this, perhaps, and now it's finally here.
it's funny because after so long in lockdown this one kinda hit me harder than i thought it would do - the idea of leaving home and going somewhere else, whether on holiday or a different kind of journey, seems like such a long-ago thing, yk?? and it's reminded me how much i miss it: the happiness about going, the weight of the ticket when you hold it at the station; the wonderings about what will happen, where you'll go, what you'll see... everything about this is so emotional and so wistful and i lovelovelove that - it comes across so perfectly and it really tugs at me :)
laura xx
Author's Response:Hi, Laura! <3
Ahahah, I think that's a coincidence, because this was one of the first I posted... :P
We all have that desire to escape our small lives and see the broader world, don't we? Although it can be scary to actually just go... but yes, the protagonist does and he's so happy of his decision! I didn't really think about the quieter happiness of something you've been looking forward to for a long time, but I like your thought about this!
And yes, I feel you... I'm so looking forward to be able to travel again! (And maybe have a FFT reunion soon? :P)
So glad this one resonated with you! <3
Wow we’re here at the end, and I have to say I was NOT expecting to see “YOLO” for your Y word… :joy: Maybe it’s because I haven’t heard the term used in like, three years, but regardless I do quite enjoy your take on the phrase/mantra/whathaveyou to be a call to people to stop worrying so much about the future or fretting about things that happened in the past; it’s what you do right now in the present that matters. It’s a lovely message :)
For a half second when I saw this was titled “Zoom” I thought I was about to read a drabble all about Zoom the oh-so-hated video meeting app and was pleasantly surprised to see it was *not* that. :joy: Anywho I really like how you’ve chosen to close out this drabble series with a call for readers to remember, and look back on memories they’ve captured, and I think that kind of brings the series full circle, to look back at where this series started. I am still awaiting the results of this challenge but I hope you do well in it, my dear!! <3
~madi
Fairy foxy review event
Author's Response:I only discover the expression YOLO quite recently, actually :P (being an old-ish non-native speaker, you know... :P) It's something I think about a lot, how we waste so much time worrying about the past or the future and forget to live the moment, and the expression makes me think of that, of an invitation to seize the moment and live in the present. It is a great message.
Ahahah! You are not the first to mention that you expected Zoom to refer to the video-call app... :P I admit that I struggled to come up with something for Z, but I think this one came out nice in the end :P Glad that you like the theme of memories in it and that it worked well to close up the collection! <3
Thank you so, so, so much again for going through the entire series and sharing your lovely thoughts! <3
Big snowball hug,
Chiara
I think you’ve nailed “wonderland,” Chiara! This speaks to us as writers, of course, who will use our own writing, our own words, to escape into a world we know and love and create our own little bubble of goodness in it that keeps out the reality and the bad things happening outside. No one to answer to, no one to bother you about why you haven’t done this or that, and you can just be happy and peaceful for a few moments. Love it!
Xenophobia has truly seen a terrible terrible rise over the last year due to the pandemic, but I have some hope for humanity still. Stamping it out is a difficult and often not-rewarding effort, but it must be done. It’s a path not easily taken by many of the group performing the xenophobia, but taking the path is part of the journey to healing and making everyone equal. Everyone must walk it alone, but we can walk it alone together. <3
~Madi
Fairy foxy review event
Author's Response:I'm glad Wonderland worked and that it resonated with you, I do think it's something all of us FFTers (or more generally writers, or artists) would relate to quite strongly. We all need those few moments to escape to the worlds of our imagination, am I right? <3
It is horrible that xenophobia even exists, that we (as humans) feel compelled to judge and discriminate other humans based on where they are from or the colour of their skin... :/ It is a long a difficult battle, but there is the hope that things will change eventually, and yes, we can be allies down that path! <3
Thank you so much for another wonderful review! <3
Aw Chiara this one about the universe is so sweet, in a way, that it’s two individuals sharing a moment together but doing so while alone themselves. I’d like to give both of them a big ol’ snowball hug <3 I’d like to think there’s sentient life out there in the big universe based on the statistical probability of it being rather high, but I must content myself with humanity’s reach in this solar system. Nicely done on this rather contemplative one, lovely!
Oh nooo poor girl :,( Ugh, I feel for her, when a bully (or a boy she clearly knows well or something similar) refuses to even acknowledge your existence even though you’re literally *right there* is so heartbreaking. I was curious what word you were going to go with considering your theme and the fact V words are difficult to come up with, lol.
~madi
Fairy foxy review event
Author's Response:I've always thought that there must be sentient life somewhere other than on Earth, surely there is another planet somewhere in the vastity of the Universe that has the right characteristics for it, right? And I thought it would be fun to write this from an alien's POV who's wondering the same questions we ask ourselves, because why not? :P Glad you found it sweet! <3
Yes, poor girl... :( I was thinking of this as the aftermath of a bad breakup, actually, where she still has feelings for the boy, but he just doesn't care (or pretends not to) Anyway, it is very painful to just being ignored... :(
Big snowball hug to you, my dear! <3
True silence when it’s been evasive for a long time can sometimes be disconcerting, but if silence is something you’ve been begging for for a while, finally getting it can be soooo refreshing. There will be some work days I don’t listen to any music like I normally do; just the ambient noise of my computer and outside is the quiet I need for that day. Sometimes the silence of no music or podcasts is what we need to recharge as humans, or to reflect more deeply on the task or thought at hand. I like that this one uses silence as a way of healing, too. It’s very poetic :)
All right though, if tick-tock isn’t about me though (in non pandemic times, of course) because some days I’ll come home and not want to do anything at all, and others I’ll come home and not want to do things but know that I need to do them but still lay on the couch paralyzed by indecision and fatigue. This is almost more of a mood in pandemic times because it’s not going *out* to see friends but having to deal with more video chats and therefore the additional screentime from that as your time in the evening ticks away. Ugh, just a big mood on both of these drabbles!
~madi
Fairy foxy review event
Author's Response:We all need a bit of silence in our lives from time to time, don't we? Too much can be overwhelming, but sometimes you really need it to just recharge, at least that's the way I feel...
Tick-tock is one that's very personal, because sometimes I feel like I don't have energy for anything, and at the same time I feel like time is slipping through my fingers and I'm getting nowhere... a bit depressing, sorry... :(
Thank you so much again, I really appreciate all your thoughts! <3
BIG OOF on this quarantine drabble, because most of us are still under “stay at home” orders or “lockdown” a year into this pandemic, and this drabble and when it was written/posted came at a time when things were maybe looking up a bit and since then it’s just gotten worse. The solitude of quarantine has become even more never-ending, and I hate to agree but going to the grocery store has become somewhat ~exciting~ as it’s something that gets me out of my apartment every couple of weeks. This is definitely one of your more poignant drabbles in this series for sure though, and I have to take a moment to reflect on all the lives lost during this pandemic and how much it could still affect all of us. <3
Rain as a follow up drabble is oddly fitting; I know I’m a member of the camp who loves being home when it’s raining outside because I feel so much more inspiration or mood to be productive when it rains. Curling up with a cup of tea and a good book or a writing document sounds like my perfect rainy day activity, much like our dear character here too. :)
~Madi
Fairy foxy review event
Author's Response:Quarantine was basically my Covid experience, and I guess it's pretty relatable to us all... :( It is hard when you don't really have many social interactions, at the same time it is very sad to think about all the lives lost to the pandemic... I'm sorry this was a bit painful to read... :/
Staying home watching the rain fall has a special soothing feeling to it, especially for us creative people. Glad you could relate to this one, too! :P
Thank you so much! <3 <3 <3
Hellooooo
The ocean is truly a calming force, even if understanding the nature of it as a whole is a difficult thing to grasp. How can the waves be lapping peacefully at the man’s feet while across the world it could be a raging wall of water tens of feet high? This drabble definitely had me feeling at ease even though our dear character’s swirling thoughts could not be calmed. <3
And then it’s a pianooooo! I grew up playing piano and will hopefully own one again in the future so this was a lovely little drabble that brought a lot of nostalgia for me ^_^ I really like how you’ve used each volume direction to utilize different forms of description of what the pianist is doing as they play because each volume direction (i am blanking on the proper term, omg) typically evokes something different in the listener. Ugh, these two drabbles together are just so peaceful, I enjoyed them immensely! :)
~Madi
Fairy foxy review event
Author's Response:So glad you enjoyed both of these! <3
That's what I was trying to express with Ocean, how nature can be soothing one moment and terrifying the next, but always beautiful and mysterious and just out of grasp for our minds...
I play piano, too, although "playing" is a strong word... :P Glad you liked the descriptions of the pianist playing and how the different intensities impact the listening
Thank you so much again! <3
Hi again Chiara! :)
I miss going to museums or art exhibitions sooo much! This chapter (M- Museum) brings back so many memories for me about going to a local museum for a few hours and just relishing in the visual and smell of all of the fantastic art I was surrounded by. They are truly refreshing things to go to, and you’ve really captured that feeling so well! The last line really really resonated with me :sparkles:
And then you go and hit me right in the stomach with this gut punch of a chapter :oof: But you do an excellent job portraying how this person with amnesia feels bad for not knowing who or what the people visiting them are talking about, but also how much more alone their amnesia makes them feel while the people are there, but how free they feel once everyone is gone. Going through something traumatic like that would be a lot to deal with on its own, but then throw four or five people who know you but you don’t know trying to *make* you remember them, and I’d want to be alone too.
~Madi
Fairy foxy review event
Author's Response:Hi, Madi! <3
Visiting a museum is truly a refreshing experience, glad this one resonated with you (and hopefully we'll be able to enjoy these things again soon! <3)
Sorry if this one was harsh... amnesia must be a terrible experience, but also it must be so hard being surrounded by all these people you can't remember who think they're trying to help (and they are) but they are only making you feel under pressure... wanting to be alone sounds like a perfectly natural reaction...
Thank you so much!
Hey again Chiara!
Ok IDK if you’ve seen the movie or musical “Waitress” but “Kneading” gave me HUGE “What Baking Can Do” vibes (song from the stage musical) that made me feel all the feels and also switch to that album to listen to, lol. I also find a lot of relaxation in baking, so I felt an element of myself was represented in this drabble too, as baking can frequently be my happy place whether I am alone or doing it with someone else. It’s a bit sad at the end with the acknowledgement that her mother is gone, but she’s keeping the tradition and memories alive by continuing to bake. <3
Aww Chiara not a lost little boy trying to find his parents again :sob: I mean, obviously he wouldn’t be lost forever, it’s just a toy store, but as a small child your sense of time is very much either “right now” or “forever” so I completely get it, lol. His association with the blue jeans and red shirt for his dad also is true to form for children’s behavior as they may not remember words as well but they sure can recall colors and objects. I’m glad it had a happy reunion at the end because I would have been very upset with you if it hadn’t been, lol. :P
~Madi
Fairy foxy review event
Author's Response:I'm not familiar with the musical Waitress, I'm afraid... anyway, I'm glad you could relate to Kneading, too... it is a very relaxing activity! And yes, it's sad that she lost her mum, but at least she has this way to feel the connection! <3
Little children getting lost happens often, but yes, it can be quite traumatic for the child... (again, I'm sorry...) Of course there would be a happy reunion at the end, I'm not that cruel... :P
Thank you for another great review! <3
Hii :)
OKAY if “Introvert” ISN’T ME AT LITERALLY ANY PARTY EVER!! *Including ones *I* am hosting!! :joy: You have captured the exact essence of being an introvert with a need to please others by going to things but also who doesn’t mind going to said things and then not really talking or interacting with other people while there. I think sometimes people forget that introverts do like social interaction, even if it means just *being* in the same space as others (lol rip to that, thanks covid) and not actively participating in conversations or games or whatever may be happening. Lovely choice for “I” :)
For some reason I picture the hometown in “Journey” to be something super suburban or something, like, a small town where most people tend to either stay or not stray very far after high school. The young man’s choice to take the leap and do something to get out of their restrictive hometown and figure out what they really want to do and who they are. Honestly I know this is just a little drabble but I feel like you could write a really good novel or full-length film script about this type of journey without all the usual annoying cliches. Just a thought ;)
~Madi
Fairy foxy review event
Author's Response:Hi again! :P
Well, I guess all of us introverts are like that, right? :P Glad you could relate! And yes, damned covid, I feel you... :/
I do imagine the hometown in Journey as a small town where everyone knows everyone and nothing exciting ever happens... :P Sometimes I wish I had that courage of just go on an adventure on my own... I don't know if I'd be able to turn this into a longer piece, but I love that you feel that way! <3
Thank you!!!
Hey again Chiara! :)
I think that “Grave” is a very touching drabble covering a difficult topic. Grief, no matter how fresh or old, is still grief, and stays with us for the rest of our lives. You’ve done a great job illustrating that, while this widow is visiting her husband’s grave, she still very clearly loves him and cares his gravestone is well cared for too. She grieves in her own way, and, in this case, that means she nicens up the flower arrangement and she has a conversation with him, though he cannot speak. The last line is truly heartwarming and makes me all mushy for your writing <3
Something you do incredibly well with “Hide” is that at first, I believe this child is hiding from some great terror or for his own safety in the wardrobe. That heightened my emotions while reading it and I was cheering the kid on as he made his break for it to safety hoping it wouldn’t be interrupted with pain or something equally terrible. Then at the end it’s just him and some of his friends or others playing hide and seek, and now I feel silly for worrying about him so much :P Love these so much! :)
~Madi
Fairy foxy review event
Author's Response:Hi again, Madi! <3
So glad you found Grave touching. Yes, grief is always there, even years after... I'm glad you liked the woman's little gestures of love, I wanted this to be mostly tender, even if still sad. I'm glad you liked the hopeful note at the end, too! <3
The twist in Hide was 100% intentional (sorry :P), I wanted to make it sound like the child was hiding from a real danger, so I'm glad you could feel the tension there! :P
Thank you so much again! <3
hello chiara, i am back again for the fairyland event!
once again, i absolutely love this. the feeling of being alone in a crowd is something that is, unfortunately, strongly relatable. and when it feels like you're in a hurry, it's easy enough to get wrapped up in your day to day and not bother to reach out. but it's only when you stop and think about it that you realize how lonely you are, even if there are constantly people surrounding you
there's something so powerful about choosing to be visible or invisible, and that sometimes it's easier to just go around and let yourself stay hidden. i loved the line about the white noise that washes over you, and the one about the life you don't really own; it's crazy to think how that could be the case, but it is once again, an unfortunately relatable feeling
i think you did a fantastic job with this, and i'm so glad you've been sharing these with us ♥
Author's Response:Hi again, darling Jill! <3
I'm so glad you liked this drabble as well! I think it is a pretty common feeling, especially when we are so used to rush through life... :/ glad it resonated with you!
Thank you so, so much for this lovely review! <3
Hi :)
Envy is such a difficult emotion for a lot of people to deal with, and your character here clearly struggles with it too. Especially as it seems all of their friends and/or people they know seem to be going places and getting all of the good things in life while they get left behind without a second thought. OOF. Very poignant and hopefully our character can break out of the envious mindset <3
So F is called “funfair” but it clearly seems that your mc here is only briefly having fun at the fair (see what I did there? :P ) until they have to come back down to earth and be an adult again. This drabble definitely fits the angst tag you’ve got, because if this person feels the fun only for a few fleeting moments in their life because they’re on a carousel and then must return to the gritty life they normally lead, well, that’s just super sad. :( You do such a great job with description throughout all of these too, lovely!!
~Madi
Fairy foxy review event
Author's Response:Hi again! :D
Envy is a really hard emotion to deal with, especially when you feel like you are the only one left behind... :/
I feel like as an adult you're always supposed to be down to earth and responsible and that leaves little space for the little joys of life, and that's sort of what I was going for with the Funfair drabble... it is a very sad one... :(
So glad you are enjoying the collection and all the descriptions as well! <3
Hey again!
Being invisible in a crowd is something I can relate to but also sometimes feel like I *want* to stay invisible. But also you make the excellent point that all it takes to break free from the crowd and crowdthink is to reach out or say hello or smile at someone, but the effort to do that for a lot of people is frequently too high for them to do it. Great commentary!
Dancer makes me go “oof” so hard because she seems like a lot of “good” young athletes I knew growing up or even younger folks who go to the Olympics. They train so hard and so long, striving for that perfection even when their bodies can’t really go on any longer, as you have described in this drabble, because they feel they have to perform with such precision for their audience or their coaches or their parents. Ugh, brings back memories of high school sports so much, but I suppose you meant for us to relate to these on some level :P Great job!
~Madi
Fairy foxy review event
Author's Response:Hello again, Madi! <3
I think a lot of people are familiar with that feeling, we live in a frenetic society where it's hard to just stop and connect to the people around us... I'm glad this felt relatable.
I meant Dancer as an actual representation of the human sacrifice narrated in Stravinski's Rite of Spring, but your interpretation makes a lot of sense, too. Glad this piece resonated with you as well!
Thank you so much again for taking the time to review! <3
Chiara
hello chiara! i'm here for the winter in fairyland review event ♥
i loved this so much. there's a common misconception that there's someone that's right for everyone and you really hit the nail on the head. and the fact that it's written in second person point of view makes it even a little bit relatable. there's not always the one and there's not always a soulmate, and that needs to be okay. i found it refreshing that it was almost okay with the narrator here, that it's easier to believe what everyone says
i really just wanted to hug this person the whole time. being alone isn't always a bad thing; there's a sense of indepence there that can't happen when you're tied to another person and i think more people need to address that. this line was the most powerful: how would you explain, if you don't quite get it yourself?
and the second person narration was so incredibly seamless and the perfect choice for this particular piece. it's a tough one to get right but unsurprisingly, you smashed it out of the park
your writing is as beautiful as ever here, and i'm so proud of you for branching out into original fiction. excellent work, dear! ♥
Author's Response:Hey, Jill! Thank you so much for stopping by, my love! <3
I'm so glad you liked this first drabble, it is a very personal one so it's nice to know that it felt a little bit relatable! <3 And yes, there isn't always a soulmate, but sometimes it is easier to just pretend to agree...
I'm so glad you liked the second person POV as well and that it worked well for this piece! :)
Thank you so much for the lovely review!!! <3 <3 <3
Hey Chiara!
I know I’ve already recorded the first third of these as podfics, but good ol fashioned reviews don’t hurt either :P I’ve gotta say, you’ve written a rather poignant series overall and this is quite the start, too. The constant questioning of “when are you gonna find someone” or “you’ll find someone eventually” is so harmful and a romantic-normative way of thinking. The character simply nodding and grinning away is tooooo truthful, oof.
The boundaries chapter is really interesting to me as well because you show the dichotomy of the princess’s world vs the actual world outside and just how different boundaries are there. AND you do it all in under 200 words. Which is TRULY impressive to capture a full sense of this world that is also not quite right, especially as the princess doesn’t even know she’s trapped. Great job on both of these!
~Madi
Fairy foxy review event
Author's Response:Hey, Madi! Thank you so much for your reviews (and also for the podfics, they were really lovely! <3) and sorry if I'm replying so late...
There is this expectation that everyone should find someone at some point, and it can be painful when you know that's just not how it works for you... I'm glad that came across well!
I'm so glad you liked the second one, and the contrast between the princess' world and the real world, too!
Thank you so much again for stopping by!
Love,
Chiara <3
Hello Again :D Popping in for those Fairies!
I haven't even started reading this drabble yet, I just wanted to point out that I love the word 'vicinity.' It has such an intrique about it and like, poetic...ness...ugh that's gonna hurt my writing cred but I stand by it. Okay, now to actually read the story.
AHHhhhhhhh!!!!! Okay. It only got better from the title. This line, "that fake, mocking proximity." I'm dead. Ugh. Who hasn't felt that ache of being so close to someone and somehow the furhterst away you've ever been?
This one hurt. In such a good, you captured a feeling I don't like to talk about sort of way. Oh! And the phrase, "Yet so pointless at the same time." as if to say she knows feeling this way isn't helpful or purposeful and wishes she didn't, but also can't help but feel ALL THE THINGS!
Author's Response:Hello again! <3
This was a painful one, I guess... it's hard to see someone you used to be very close with becoming so distant, and being physically so near but emotionally miles away... I'm sorry it hurt, but also not really, because I'm glad this resonated with you! <3
Thank you so much for another lovely review! <3
Hello Again :D Here to rep the Frost Kittens (but also because I'm addicted to these drabbles)
I loved how softly joyful this story was. All of the letters I've read so far have been a sort of heartache feeling of lonliness, but solitude doesn't have to be sad or painful and this captures that beatiful tranquility so perfectly.
I love to grab a blanket and a cup of coffee and just hear the pitterpatter of my keyboard along with the pitterpatter of the rain outside, me alone with my thoughts. Such a wonderful new take on this idea of solitide!
Author's Response:Jacqueline! <3
So glad you liked this more peaceful version of solitude! I agree, there is something special in just cuddling with a warm drink and listening to the rain (and writing :P)
Thank you so much for stopping by again with this lovely review! <3
Hugs,
Chiara
hiiii again for the winter in fairyland event!!
this is yet another one of these which is so so resonant for me - the idea of being at a party somewhere and feeling a bit out of place, a bit tired of all the small talk and the being friendly and the meeting new people, but still... enjoying it?? and still wanting to be there, because you're still having fun - it's just perhaps a different kind of fun? and the way that she can stay a little longer, perhaps because she's sitting on her own which is less effort and less tiring, so she's enjoying it more and can spend more time, watching the people around her and enjoying their company, in a quieter way.
i loved the repetition of 'doesn't mind too much'. it's one of those phrases which is so simple and used for almost everything from things you actually really do mind (but you want to excuse it or don't want to make a big deal) and things you don't mind at all, where you're happy to be there or to be doing it, even if it isn't something you might have chosen for yourself. it's so nuanced and it brings a whole heap of potential meanings and layers to this story which i love.
it's so so good, how many potential different meanings you put into a little story like this. it's not an easy thing to do, regardless of word count, but you do it so well here and make it look like it is super easy, yk?? and it's always si so good.
laura xx
Author's Response:Hi again! :D
I mean, all of us introverts have felt that way at some point, right? Enjoying taking part in things, but from the sidelines, in a quieter and more distanced way. ;)
I love your thoughts about the "don't mind too much" line!
Thank you so much for another great review (and again sorry if I'm doing a very poor job at replying... :P)
Big snowball hug!
here again for the winter in fairyland event!! :)
okay okay okay this is a brilliant, twisty story (and i'll do my best to avoid giving it away! :P) and i love it. i really, really expected the tension in the first three-quarters of this to carry through - for it to be a darker, deeper, scarier kind of ending - and it almost made me laugh when it wasn't? but it worked so so well because the adrenaline of the game, the bite of competitiveness, the nervousness about it all - it's so true to things like the twist!! when you're young those things matter - it's bragging rights and who's allowed to be smug and who's better (even if it's just for a handful of moments!).
those first three-quarters are so so evocative: the hiding, the waiting, the adrenaline which comes through the writing from the narrator. the conflict with the idea of being scared of the dark but the sense that he's old enough he isn't - or shouldn't be, at least - and the relief when he knows he's safe (for now!). the anticipation in the shorter sentences at the end of the second paragraph when he's checking to see if it's safe and then getting ready to run; it comes through so clearly!
and it's yet another twist on the theme of being alone - because as the story says, that's literally the whole point of it: being alone and staying alone. company - another person there - is losing and that's not the aim of the game.
so so clever and so good!
laura xx
Author's Response:Hello again! :D
This one might be one of my favourites, actually! :P I think you know how much I love children... and yes, at that age, these things really matter! :D I'm so glad you enjoyed the twist! :D
I'm so glad you could feel the tension and adrenaline in the beginning and that the way I wrote it seemed to work well! :D
This is definitely an unusual take on the theme, but I'm glad it worked! Thank you so much for another great review! <3
me again - for the winter in fairyland event!!
ahhhh this is such a lovely, soft, sad story. it's so solemn and so sweet, even with the sadness: i love the mention of 'new' flowers and the feeling of repetition throughout it: that this is just another visit, another time coming back; that she'll be back next week as well and the week after (or however often she comes back). it almost feels mundane - normal and ordinary; another thing happening in the day, like making breakfast or washing the dishes up. and there's something so quietly, simply heartbreaking about that even as it does make me smile: because there's a loyalty to keeping on going back and a steadfastedness to it, too.
and i love the simplicity of it: there's no big news, no big event, no exciting life updates. it's the smallest, littlest things she tells him - and that you tell us - and it gives this whole story a softness which adds up as it goes on, to make it feel kinda heavy by the end.
ugh i love the details, yk? i love the apple pie and the orange sky and how the flowers she brings stand out and contrast, softly, against the grass and the stone. i love the life-and-death contrast of her talking to him and the wind, anthropomorphised into touching her with a caress. it's so beautiful and so sweet and it brings the whole image of this lady in the graveyard to life so fully. and i like as well that we don't really know anything about her - we know she's visiting a man's grave; we know they have a son together - but we don't know too much more specific about her, like a name or where she lives, and it makes this story feel almost universal in a way. and those details don't matter: the flowers and the apple pie and the colour of the sunset and the breeze matter.
laura xx
Author's Response:Hi again, Laura, my dear! <3
I'm so glad you liked this one, too! I'm glad it felt sweet, even in its sadness. I guess it is sort of a routine for her, although not really because there is this deep affection and loyalty, too.
I'm glad you like the simple things she talks about, and all the small details and the life/death contrast.
I'm very bad at replying to these reviews, but I really appreciate them and how thoughtful they are! Thank you so much again, my dear! <3
absolutely no prizes for guessing who it is - and i'm so glad for the winter in fairyland event because i'm so bad at reviewing things and have been so out of the loop with reading things that i probably wouldn't have read this otherwise and that would have been a real, real shame because this whole collection is excellent.
anyway! i'm a huge huge huge fan of putting seemingly conflicting things together and juxtaposing them and finding points of similarity and the idea of a funfair ride - flying round in a little cart, subject entirely to different forces pushing you this way and that with the wind in your hair, surrounded by people screaming and shouting and smiling yourself - being lonely, feeling not-quite-there, is such a brilliant contrast and yet. and yet it works so well because i can imagine it so clearly?? through your writing and the imagery you put into it. especially that one line 'he stays silent' - it brings him (and me, as the reader) out of the rest of the excitement and sets him apart. alone. quiet. almost outside of the rest of the happiness and the enthusiasm and the laughter. it's almost jarring and i love that.
i love as well the way he walks away after it and all the details you put in about the fair going on around him: children and families - it contrasts so deliciously but so sadly with him on his own, this lonely figure with his hands in his pockets. and it just enhances the separation: all the wonder children feel at things like fairs, with the sweets and the rides and the thrill of all these new things; and for him, the only thing which is wonderous is the ride itself and the feeling of being pushed around, flying almost. it's a sad, painful sort of thing: the idea that he's lost that kind of wonder, of enchantment.
laura xx
Author's Response:Okay, I've been procrastinating replying to these reviews for way too long... :P
And, wait, what does it mean, no prizes??? I want a prize, Laura, that's not fair! :P But also, thank you so much! <3 <3 <3
I'm so glad you like the contrast between everyone's excitement and the protagonist's loneliness and quietness and that it was effective! Losing the wonder is exactly what I was trying to express in this and I'm glad it came through.
Sorry for the short and very late reply, but thank you so much for the lovely and detailed review! <3
Hugs,
Chiara
you're going to get bored of me coming back at some point, but it's me again for the winter in fairyland!!
i lovelovelove the return to the theme of loneliness - it was less apparent in the last one, even though the girl was on her own dancing, separated out from the rest (singled out, even, chosen to be alone perhaps), and i love the way the separation in this is so clear-cut, even if it's invisible and even if it's almost self-generated through envy.
resentment is a really difficult emotion and it's hard to make it sympathetic often, without making the person the narrator is envious of too obviously bad or something - but this is such a neat, succint summary of it. it really is a spiralling thing - it comes and goes and the bitterness this story has is so so true to envy, too: the sense that what does it even matter; the nastiness of it all is so real in this and i love that about it. it's not shying away from that side of it, pretending that envy is this lighthearted thing, quasi-competitive but well-intentioned or something; no, in this envy is dark and it's cruel and it's bitter and it's resentful and kinda sad, and that's so much more real and so much deeper.
i lovelovelove the metaphor of it being a barrier - something physical which you can touch and move; and i love the curtain in particular: something you could open, something other people could open too, which closes you off from other people and leaves you in a smaller, perhaps darker space on your own.
ughhh it's so sad and so vicious, almost, but it's so good!!
laura xx
Author's Response:No, I'll never get bored! ;)
Envy does create this distance between people, doesn't it? Even if it is invisible and self-generated.
And yes, it is a nasty emotion, and definitely not sympathetic, but also it just sort of feeds on itself and you can't really control it? And I guess I wanted it to be harsh but real, so I'm glad it came across in an authentic way!
I felt the curtain metaphore worked well, so I'm glad you liked that, too!
Thank you so much for another great review!
Chiara
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