
I'm not crying you're crying! So recently my grandma got diagnosed with breast cancer, and she makes rolls for every family occasion. IF YOU WANT to help, there is a job for you at any age, but I imagine when she was first married, and my grandpa was off working the potato fields in Idaho, she made rolls by herself in their kitchen in the mountains like this, the way she learned from her mom. And then she taught my mom, and then she taught me, and now I have yeast in the cupboard waiting to teach my son. This is a wonderful little piece on that passing nostalgic quality to home made food, where all of your senses are over run by what you're doing, and have done, and will do so many more times. It is very beautiful and I love it so very much.
Go foxes!
Author's Response:Aww... so sorry for your granma... *hugs*
I love family traditions, and especially cooking traditions, and all the memories linked to them... I'm glad this moved you and that you enjoyed it.
Thank you so much for the lovely review! <3
I like this one alot, it speaks to the inner adventurer in me. I love train rides especially, and will elect to take the trian over other transport whenever available, which is not all that common in the US I believe. Not like a subway, like a real train. I am amazed by how effectively you're able to convey such a content mood in so few words. You can really feel the sense of anticipation but also the subtle familiarity of it as welll. Hopefully that makes sense. I think it is the perfect adjectives you've managed to put in exactly the right places. Very well done!
Also go Foxes!!
Author's Response:Hey, Chelts! Thank you for stopping by again! :D
Ah, I love trains, too! It is a lovely way to travel! :D I will admit, I've never had the courage to just leave on my own like the protagonist of this, but I do love the idea of it, of just going on an adventure and enjoying the journey. So glad you thought I conveyed the feeling well! <3
Thank you so much for reviewing! <3
this one was so so beautiful, that feeling of escaping into your own world, where you can be yourself, without any judgement, without anyone questioning you, or your motives, or what you're doing with yourself or your life, it's something i long for a lot of the time and this just made me smile really wide after all of the angsty ones before. somehow, it reminds me of chosen family, when you manage to create a group of people around you who just fit with you, who love you for who you are, with whom you can be free, and in another way it also reminds me of like, online communities even - you find people with similar interests, like on fft, and you enjoy and appreciate each other and form friendships and it's escapism in a way, just like reading books, or playing video games, but it's also beautiful escapism and everyone needs it in their lives. i just,,,really fucking loved this.
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:Back to reply to a few more reviews :P
And I'm so glad you liked this one as well and that it made you smile! I think we all long for that kind of freedom to just be ourselves, and especially for us creative people the need to escape to our own mental worlds is something that I think we can all relate to... I love your thoughts about chosen family and online communities! Honestly, I can't imagine my life without FFT at this point...
Thank you so much for the lovely review!!! <3 <3 <3
oh god this one was really heartbreaking. being so close to someone and yet so fucking far away from them, them seemingly uncaring of you, of your feelings, of anything about you, it really hurts and i thought you painted that picture perfectly in this drabble. she's obviously in love with him, this guy that basically ignores her, the way she describes him and how she notices him, the vortex of emotions she feels, it's almost overwhelming to read, especially when he just frowns, gaze slips away from her, almost as if she isn't there, it's truly so so sad. and then when she leaves to cry in the bathroom, my poor lil heart really broke for her. i just want to give her a hug.
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:This is definitely a sad one... poor girl... :( I imagined this as the aftermath of a bad breakup, in which she obviously still have strong feelings but he just drifted away... it is very painful, being physically close to someone but so distant emotionally... she definitely needs a hug... :/
Thank you so much for another lovely review! <3 <3 <3
i love the plot twist because it's so unexpected, a plot twist in a short drabble but it's there and it's perfect. it's somehow really comforting to think that there is someone else out there, someone else wondering the exact same things as we humans wonder, whether we're alone, whether there is more to space than just our little planet, our sun, but at the same time it's sad to think that we will never know them. i have such an intense desire to know that there are other worlds out there and i tell myself that it's impossible that there aren't, and even if it does seem insignificant in the grand scheme of things, i'm still hoping, you know? it doesn't make sense but i just can't help myself. i'm already so small and insignificant so being that in the face of the universe,,,i need something more to be out there. and this drabble really perfectly captured those exact feelings.
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:I've always thought that there must be something more out there. The universe is too vast for us to be its only inhabitants, am I right? I'm glad this gave you hope in a way! :D Also, so glad you enjoyed the plot twist, I loved the idea when it first came to me, I thought it might be fun... :P
Glad you enjoyed this one, thank you so much for the review! <3
this one brought out a lot of feelings in me, but the one that's scariest of all is the meaninglessness of life. how we live, day in and day out, just you know, sleeping and eating and working, waiting until the work is done, but then you're home and work is never done and you both want the day to end and for it to not end, to have a little time for yourself, to relax, to get some energy, but it seems futile, and with the way you used the clock in this, with the tick-tocking, reading it like that, those words, it really brings about a sense of dread in me, passive dread and it's,,,scary and it makes me sad and i just want more, yk? and i feel like most of us do but ,,,it's so fucking hard :|
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:This one is sort of haunting, I suppose... and yes, I often feel like my life is just slipping away and I'm just following this routine that doesn't really get me anywhere (sorry if this sounds a bit depressing...) so, yeah, what you say is pretty much what I was trying to express with this drabble, and yes, it's kind of scary and definitely sad and so hard... :/
Thank you so much, as always, for sharing your thoughts on this! <3
i love the sentiment, the idea behind this drabble. because, yes, sometimes, for some people even often, you do need a moment of alone time, a moment of quiet and peace and just time with yourself to think, to daydream, to think about the future, and possibilities and the past and just yourself. so very often it's in bed, during the night, when very little can disturb you and you've written that here, those feelings, so very very well. for me, those moments of solitude and being alone with your thoughts are very scary and i try to quiet the, but in this drabble there's a beautiful sense of calm when the person has this time for themselves and it's wonderful to read.
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:I really enjoy when I have some time to just be alone with my thoughts, it is very refreshing and recharging for me. I suppose it isn't like that for everyone, but I also think that sometimes it just helps to connect with yourself, if that makes sense? I'm glad you loved the sentiment and that you enjoyed reading! <3
Thank you for another lovely review! <3
chiara i really adore this one. i feel like i've said this about a couple of the drabbles, but this one has such a nice, cozy feeling to it - watching the rain fall, listening to it, when you're warm and inside with a cup of tea, and with nowhere to be, it's one of the best feelings in the world, maybe comparable only to doing the same thing but with snow. you're just amazing at creating that particular atmosphere in so few words and i think it's wonderful. and the way you describe the rain, all the sounds and how it falls, it's all so fucking well written, it's really really amazing.
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:I'm so, so glad you liked the descriptions and the feeling of this one! It is very cozy and relaxing and such a lovely feeling to just watch the rain fall from the warmth of your house... and yes, with snow is probably even better... :P Glad you liked this one so much! <3
Thank you!!! :D
it's really eerie reading this in february, almost march, knowing we've been in this unnatural, awful state of things for more than a year, knowing that even with these vaccines, it will still take a long long time until things go back to normal. we have a "new normal" now, and it seems like it's here to stay. questioning about what you're going to do after quarantine ends, about the life *after*, it's all so fucking dystopian and so scary and reading it out like this is both upsetting and at the same time somehow cathartic, knowing i'm not alone in feeling this way, but still, godd, i wish it were all over. so many people have died, and yeah, reducing them to numbers is one of the scariest things in this pandemic. just dead (and sick) *numbers*. sigh
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:It's absurd, isn't it, that we've been in this situation for a year and a half already... and it doesn't look like things are really going to improve anytime soon... I mean, I suppose they have improved a little since it all started, but still... :/ And no, you're definitely not alone in feeling this way... and yes, it is horrible to think of how many lives have been lost, and cruel how they are reduced to numbers and statistics, but sort of inevitable, I suppose... :(
Thank you so much for another great review!!! <3
i loved loved loved the descriptions here, of the pianist and how they play, of the different forces behind their fingers, how first it's slow, piano, until it builds into a crescendo, a cacophony almost, but harmonious cacophony, and you can get lost in it, and then it slows down again and it's peaceful. your word choice and the rhythm of the drabble really flowed so fucking well with the theme, followed the music in a way, and it was such a great way of using the pianoforte and the cyclical monologue line, music as a language, it all has multiple meanings and like, even if it's so short and beautiful it's also vast at the same time, speaks so much about this pianist and the music and just,,,beautiful
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:I'm so glad the descriptions in this worked well, and that the rhythm of the drabble seemed to follow the music in a way. I have to say, this is one I'm especially proud of. :P
So glad you enjoyed this one, too! Thank you for another super lovely review! <3
there is something truly magical, and almost otherworldly about the ocean and the vastness of it and the feeling that you could totally lose yourself, literally and metaphorically, in the ocean, and i think you brought that here, in this drabble, in a way that makes it seem simple, contemplating the vastness of the ocean and how you can never fully understand it, never grasp it all and how that isn't even the point of it, but staring into it can be a little like staring into the void and it can be magnificent but also scary. like dipping your toe in and being connected with who knows how many lives in that same ocean, maybe others who are standing on the shore and doing the same thing you are. the drabble is very philosophical in nature, without ever actually going into it, but it's so deep and it makes you really think and i love that about it.
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:There really is something magical about the ocean and its vastness and you truly could get lost just staring into it, beautiful and scary at the same time... I'm so glad all the images and feelings came through in this drabble and that it made you think! Thank you for another lovely review! <3
the concept of amnesia always scared me, and actually experiencing it due to some stuff that happened to me (though not in the way described here) was a very dark and very upsetting experience that i don't think i will ever be able to shake off. to have parts of your life be something that you can't reach, can't recall, that there are people in your life who you can't remember even if they're your family, it's all so deeply sad even though in this drabble, the person doesn't seem like they're sad, more like they're disassociated from these people who claim to know them and for me as a reader and for the people in the lives of the narrator, it's all the more upsetting, but i thought you brought out that feeling of upset and uneasiness perfectly in this drabble.
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:I've never experienced amnesia myself, but I imagine it would be so scary and frustrating and so painful both for the person experiencing it and the people around them... glad you thought I captured the upsetting feeling well, and sorry if this brought back bad memories...
Thank you so much again for the review! <3
omg i absolutely fucking love your description of walking alone through a museum, of experiencing the art in your own way, of finding those really special works of art that really move you on another level - it's something i deeply enjoy, going to a museum or gallery alone, without having to tlak to anyone there, just enjoying the art, immersing yourself in it until you feel like you could absolutely get lost in the world depicted in whatever work of art you're looking at. but those special pieces, the ones that you come back to again and again, there's just something sublime about finding them, almost otherworldly, like there's a piece of your heart in that work of art and you carry the work of art inside you and there's a connection..idk but you really described that feeling beautifully.
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:I'm so glad you liked the descriptions of walking through the museum and that you could relate to the feeling. There is something really special about finding that piece of art that just speaks to you... I'm glad I could convey the feeling well! :)
Thank you for another lovely review! <3
ayy the fear and anxiety and just utter terror of the young boy were just jumping off the screen here, but more than anything else was the feeling of relief and happiness of both him and his mum and dad and his sister when they finally found each other. i loved how you described he way he was searching for his mum and dad, thinking that the man in similar clothes to his father would actually be his father, the desperation to find them, it was all so well written from the child-like perspective, then the questioning of why he didn't listen to his mum, it somehow always comes too late, when the damage is already done but. but this didn't end sad and i'm so glad about it, that they found each other and that the boy is safe again!
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:I'm glad all the emotions came through well in this one, too. Both the fear and desperation of the child when he was lost and then the relief when he found his family again. It can be so scary to get lost as a little kid, but all's well that end well, right? ;) So glad you enjoyed this one, too! <3
this one is really hurting me even though i know it's not technically supposed to but,,this, the handed down recipe, the fond memories, the stress relief of kneading and making something that was made in your family for so long before you and will most likely be made after you, it's something that i don't really have and won't have and i'm just kinda,,envious of this person and it makes my heart break and tear up. yeah, they miss their mum, and that hurts too, but they have beautiful, wonderful memories and this recipe and the process of making it, it's all tied in with them and it's something to remember the ones before them and it's just a lovely sentiment.
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:As I was saying, grief and family bounds are my favourite things to write about... and I also love the idea of family traditions being passed down, especially when related to food/recipes... it's the Italian way, I guess... :P I'm so glad this felt touching, even if a bit hurtful... <3
Lots of love! <3
fucking hell chiara i absolutely adore the wanderlust in this drabble, it's so wonderfully vivid and it's a joy to read. this desire for adventure in the narrator also feels like i could touch it even though that makes zero sense but you're just so good at telling his story and i love it. and that one small moment of fear before he actually boards the bus, it's so realistic but it's quickly overcome and he embarks on this wonderful journey, not just to explore the world, but also himself, and it's a really cool concept. going and not stopping and just continuing the adventure, i wish i could do something like that. i'd totally read a sequel to this drabble, too :P
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:I'm not sure if I would ever have that courage, of just leaving alone without a real plan and enjoying the adventure, but I do love the idea of it, and I'm so glad the emotions in this resonated with you, too. Also that little moment of fear before embarking on the journey... I think everyone would feel it at least a tiny bit, but the desire of adventure and exploring the world is stronger :P So glad you enjoyed the feeling of this!!! :D <3
so i'm extroverted, but sometimes i, too, like to be alone, though that never ends particularly well, so reading about this introverted person genuinely brought a smile to my face because she seems so comfortable with being alone, alone with her thoughts and alone with herself and enjoying the night by herself but still in the near vicinity of the people around her and i just,,,somehow i even envy her. it's because i always feel like i need to be the center of attention, to talk to everyone, to try and make people like me, to outrun whatever lurks in my brain when i'm alone, that just reading about someone who just seems so calm and collected and happy in her own skin, it's so beautiful and wonderful and gives me hope.
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:That's funny, because as an extremely introverted person, I often feel envious of people who feel comfortable interacting with strangers and talking to everyone... :P but yeah, I guess I sort of get what you are saying... and feeling at ease just being with yourself is a plus of being introverted, I suppose :P I'm glad this gave you hope and made you smile! <3
Snowball hug! <3
oh my god for a very scary and upsetting moment i thought that this was a child hiding from his parent or parents or someone else, hiding in the closet because of possible abuse and i just,,,that hits really close but god i was so happy that it was just child's play even though it stirred such deep feelings in me of unease. and the child is also a little uneasy in the dark, but i love that this ten year old is brave enough to face the darkness and it's all in good fun, playing hide and seek, so in the end it really made me smile and i'm so glad about it! it was so well written, too, all your drabbles are but i just,,love them okay. especially the way you describe these moments of aloneness, somehow you've got a real knack for creating the perfect atmosphere for it.
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:I'm sorry if the opening gave you a bit of anxiety... :/ I wanted to give it a little, unexpected twist (I have a bit too much fun with those... :P) But yes, it was all in good fun, and I'm glad you enjoyed that! :)
So glad you thought it was well written and that I did a good job setting the atmosphere! And that you are enjoying the collection in general! Thank you so much for another great review! <3
Love,
Chiara
i've got tears in my eyes right now and i just,,,chiara you've done such a magnificent job in this, the descriptions at the start, then the deserted graveyard, just this lonely woman talking to her husband who's passed away, and then the mention of their son,,i don't know, it all just made my heart hurt a lot and maybe it's the familial relationship because i get entranced by them and get jealous of them, and there's this palpable love that radiates off the woman, in arranging the flowers, in visiting the grave, in talking to the husband, and then at the end, thinking he might've been listening it's all just a lot of very strong emotions and i absolutely loved reading it.
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:Grief and family love might be my favourite themes to write about... :P I wanted this to be a more bittersweet piece... sad and touching, but in a soft way? I'm glad it did emotion you! <3
Glad you liked the descriptions as well, and that you could feel all the love here... and I'm so sorry if that's something you feel the lack of... *many hugs*
Love you! <3
this one speaks to me of such utter, inconsolable loneliness, it's just this person, man, this moment of happiness and disconnect from reality that he feels on the funfair ride, it's so very disconcerting, when you think about how going for this ride alone feels also awkward for him, so it's not a natural, not a wanted loneliness, he doesn't seem to want to be alone, but getting lost in a funfair among people, but still apart from them, seems to fulfill at least one small sliver of happiness for him and that makes me both really really sad for him but also happy that at least there's this. but the silence and the disappearance just tell so so much about him and the way he wants to live but,,isn't living that way now. and it's so fucking sad.
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:I guess this is very sad... I don't think there is a lonelier feeling than being on your own in a place like a funfair, and the protagonist here is clearly craving for some connection he doesn't have right now, even if I guess this little moment of thrill/happiness is something, at least... sorry for the sadness here... :/
Thank you so much for another lovely review! <3
a dark curtain being thrown over me, separating me from other people in my life is exactly how i so often feel, it's so fucking familiar it hurts, you know? but envy, yes. i feel a lot of that, not sure whether it's envy or jealousy, or if it's the same thing either way, but seeing other people living happy, fulfilled lives without all the problems i face (or the narrator in the case of this drabble), it makes me hurt and i always feel guilty for feeling like that, and when people kinda reach out, i tend not to see it that way, tend to think the darkest of myself and even of them, and it makes me feel guilty, and so fucking detached, exactly what you've described here and it's also hella fucking scary, living like that. and so it's just this vicious cycle and then it's easier, maybe better, or maybe worse, to drift away, distance yourself even further and just,,,yeah. it also really sucks, to feel that way. :| and things might be all in your head, but it's still there and it doesn't help, like at all, that it's *just* in your head. maybe that's even worse :|
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:I do feel this way too at times... like I'm left behind, and everyone else have it all figured out and are so successful and I'm just not good enough and, yes, the guilt that comes with envy (or jealousy... I think they are pretty close concept in this context... and yes, maybe it's more like jealousy, but still...) I'm sorry you feel that way, but also I'm glad this drabble resonated with you as well! <3
Thank you again for another lovely review and so, so many hugs! <3
this one was really angsty and probably will stay as a favourite of mine - pushing yourself to the very limits of what you can do, and then going beyond that, fighting against yourself, against your body and its exhaustion, it's something i've experienced, not in dancing but in swimming, still, it's not so different. but more than that, it's not just a physical battle, it's more of a mental one. fighting against yourself also goes as far as fighting against your own mental health problems, i don't know whether you intended this drabble to transcend the physical, but for me, it definitely resonates on that level and i can really connect with it. fighting, and fighting, and fighting, and others supposedly cheering you on...until one day you lose the fight. it's one of my biggest fears but still, i loved this drabble.
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:Glad this one resonated with you, it's probably one of my favourites as well, if only from a stylistical point of view.
When I wrote this I meant it in a more literal way, to be honest, but I guess it can be interpreted in a more metaphorical way... it must be so hard, pushing yourself to your limit and beyond, both phisically and mentally... I'm sure you will win all your battles, though! *hug*
Thank you for another great review! <3 <3 <3
the idea behind this drabble is one that has always interested me - how many people we pass each day in a crowd, on public transport, or even just in passing by them on a crowded street, how many lives that we touch only briefly by coexisting in the same space but never interacting? it must be a lot, i don't know whether anyone ever tried to figure out the number, but just all these threads of lives intersecting but never actually, truly intersecting or touching, it just kinda speaks to me about the broader universe. like, how small we as people are in the grand scheme of things, and unimportant and irrelevant. it always makes me sad because i don't like feeling so small even though i know i am. but this was just a beautiful drabble, it made me think a lot.
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:I'm glad this one gave you food for thought. Yes, there are so many lives we cross in our day life that we know nothing about and it is weird if you stop to actually think about it... and yes, I get what you mean about the feeling of being small and irrelevant... it isn't a pleasant thought but still kind of true...
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this! <3
gah a golden cage is still just a cage seems to resonate a lot with this drabble. i just, it's so well written and i love how you've weaved an entire story just in drabble form, there's so much more to it, but the idea of being locked in a tower, even if it's in a metaphorical, not just literal sense like in a fairy tale, it's actually pretty terrifying, this person not being able to know life fully, not knowing what it feels like to be in love, or just like, live like a regular person and experience life in all its many different forms. yes, you can have anything you want, but you still can't have *life*.
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:So glad you liked this one, too, and how it is basically a fairytale in drabble form :)
That's exactly what I was going for. The princess apparently has the perfect life, but is it really life? A golden cage is still just a cage is 100% the vibe I was going for!
Thank you so much for another lovely review! <3
god this is so beautiful in a weird way because it shows that the person does know who they are and what they feel, even if most everyone else thinks that they're destined for something else, to fall in love and end up with someone, when they just,,don't feel the same, don't feel the attraction or desire or need for someone in that way. but it's also so fucking sad because there's this palpable feeling of dissonance between the narrator and the people in the world around them, just peak not-understanding-each-other-at-all and yes, while it is easier to pretend, it's also obvious that it is hurtful to the narrator since it would be a lot more easier to just be themselves and their identity to not be questioned. i feel so much for this feeling :|
(for foxy glory!)
Author's Response:Hi Kris! <3
Finally here to reply to your lovely reviews on my drabble collection! Thank you so much for stopping by and taking the time to review them all!!! <3 <3 <3 (And sorry for my lateness in replying... *couch*)
I'm so glad you liked this one! As you probably guessed, it's a very personal one, so it means a lot that people could sympathize... it is kind of hurtful, because there is this expectation that everyone should fall in love and find a person to share their life with, and not fitting into that standard, even if you know that's just who you are, you almost feel like there's something wrong with you... I'm not sure if that makes sense...
Thank you so much for the lovely review! <3
Snowball hug,
Chiara