Name: Felpata_Lupin (Signed) · Date: 10 May 2020 05:06 PM · For: and that was the moment i knew

Taylor!!! Why?????????? *cries*

What's James' problem? No, really! What the hell??? This is not like him at all? Why would he just ignore her like that? Why would he just not show up without a shred of justification? I'm so, so angry at him?! :(

Poor Lily... it makes me so sad that she felt so betrayed... and I can see how it would be especially painful because she's already been disappointed by many people she's loved in her life... and the fact that James is just one more name on that list breaks my heart... :( And... maybe that's the problem. Nothing about James has ever felt like a trick, or a lie, or like he's ever anything but what he appears to be. That's one of the things she likes best about him, the fact that he's unapologetically himself and doesn't waver from that. This broke my heart because, yes, that's what makes James special... he's so genuine, like an open book, and yet... Taylor, Siriusly, what the hell!!!

And the idea that Lily has just decided that she's going to just cut everyone off from now on and not allowing herself to ever grow affectionate to anyone again makes me so sad too... :(

I feel like I should comment more (your writing is stunning as always, btw, and I enjoyed seeing the group of friends together so much! You always capture each one of them so perfectly!) but I'm just too hurt to be coherent... :/ Anyway, you did a great job as always!

Thank you for requesting!

Snowball hug,

Chiara

Author's Response:

ah, i can't wait for the novel when i actually get to explain james' absence, but your anger at him is totally justified.

 

and poor lily has been through so much and been hurt by so many people - that kind of ends up a pretty central part of her character in this universe, because she's been hurt too many times and has a lot of issues trusting people now.

 

"too hurt to be coherent" means i've accomplished my goal with this fic i think - it's supposed to be one big ouch of a fic lol. but i promise i'll make things better for them eventually!!

 

<3

Name: sunshine_locks (Signed) · Date: 25 Apr 2020 12:57 AM · For: and that was the moment i knew

hi taylor! i’m here… well not for a swap. i don’t believe i’ve left reviews for many people that weren’t swaps. very interesting. but anyways. i already read the fic a while back, but i just now thought to post my thoughts on it.

 

the first thing is: wow, the references to ‘the moment i knew’ are heavy handed. like i was obligated to listen to the song after reading this fic, and it was really cool to see how this fic was guided by certain lyrics of the song. also, potentially, i don’t think i’ll be able to unstick lily from this song ever now.

 

lily here generally seems a lot more innocent here too. like she’s obviously not as innocent as in your other jily stories, but like she still has some of that hope left, you know? it kind of hurt to see the train crash knowing lily would just hurt that badly in the end. not to mention, just finding out that maybe you aren’t worth somebody’s (especially when that somebody is as important as james is) time is just gutting to know? just cause like you’re starting to realize that maybe they don’t like you as much as you like them. this may be the first time i’ve actually hated james potter in any fic. I really feel bad for lily, and if lily ever finds out why james didn’t show up, he better have a damn good explanation lol.

 

also, even way before the decision to build her guards up even higher, there’s just this sense that lily doesn’t take well to most people, and that it really was a feat that she even got as close with james as she did. that’s… got to hurt. and it makes me sad that lily knows how to mask her emotions, especially because i know how to mask my emotions around certain people, and i don’t do it because i want to lol. she must’ve been punished really badly at some point for wearing her emotions like that for all to view, and that makes my heart hurt.

 

in regards to her decision though, i totally understand why lily would have made that decision, because it really is painful to love someone wholeheartedly and openly, and so eventually one comes to the conclusion that perhaps that it is better not to love at all. i hope she learns eventually that it’s not a weakness to be vulnerable, but i’m sure she’ll make a few steps in that direction in the novel, even if it’s not that grand of a change in the end.

 

this was a great one-shot! thanks for writing! xx

Author's Response:

hi!!

 

haha yes the song references were definitely heavy-handed - the whole song has such a strong narrative quality to it that it all just slotted into this fic perfectly, since the narrative is so simular.

 

she's definitely fairly innocent here - not completely, but certainly she hasn't really completed her transition into this hardened character that she is in quidditchfic just yet. and here she is, just getting completely let down by someone she really trusted - james' reasons will be explained eventually, but this is a pretty deep cut that won't heal too easily.

 

oh yeah, i think between petunia and severus, she starts to have really big problems with trusting people and with showing her emotions, because they're almost always manipulated against her by both of those people. and the result is this really isolated person - and james' actions have only cemented that. she's not doomed to that mindset forever, but it'll certainly be a pretty difficult thing to undo.

 

thanks for reading!! <3

Name: TidalDragon (Signed) · Date: 24 Apr 2020 07:54 PM · For: and that was the moment i knew

Howdy Taylor!

 

Now that the pleasantries are out of the way - how dare you. I'm not sure why since we got the deep and repeated Lily thoughts, the friend implications, etc., but this felt like such a subtle death for such an iconic relationship. I think that struck me perhaps because of how well you wrote it to the summary. That sounds dumb because that's what should happen I suppose, but I think maybe it's the way you posed the summary as a question and the story as an answer. And then you had the heartbreaking answer at the end. #uded

 

As for the rest of the writing as a whole, I thought it worked really well to include this particular event all in one night, but against the backdrop of the time between graduation and the fateful party. Perhaps my favorite part of the story was where she describes what she loved about James always being his authenticity and then lumps him in with Petunia and Snape (UGH. Again. #uded). And how the quidditch contract permeates the story around all that and around every character to a certain extent.

 

I wish I had more coherent thoughts, BUT... #uded

 

Thanks for writing the soulcrushingly cruel story!

Author's Response:

'how dare you' is a very very fair reaction to this lmao

 

it's definitely a very subtle death, but it will come roaring back to life at some point

 

lumping james in with petunia and snape KILLED ME like i was actually mad at myself for implying that those two were even remotely in the same league as james but like, in lily's mind they feel reallllll similar right now.

 

#uded is also a fair reaction, i crushed my own soul with this one too lol

 

thanks for reading!

Name: something wicked (Signed) · Date: 24 Apr 2020 12:11 PM · For: and that was the moment i knew

 

Aaaagggghjjjjn Taylor more pleeeease!! Now i'm really mad about the blatant lack of the ENTIRE bloody novel to go with this because moreeee it was SO good. 

 

Right from the start there's this bad feeling, with lily making sure she looks just right just for james. Anyone putting that level of attention to detail and thought  in is always going to be let down, and of course all of the the the moment i knew references creeping which just makes this fic seem so tragic right from the start. She's so bright and happy and beautiful and she's just going to be let down. 

 

(and yes this does low-key read like a villain origin story.) 

 

The rest of the gang are so cute, the wee hints of character that we get though sets them up so well. There's the tiny hint of wolfstar and then the girls just being absolute queens. I really love how you've set them all up with tiny little details. It's interesting that the boys and james also seem to be drifting. Sirius has a bit of resentment already coming though, clearly there's more to the story there and i cannot WAIT to get at it. 

 

I feel so sorry for Lily, everyone knows that she's upset but she just carries on pretending. I think anyone who's been in a similar situation can relate to how let down and despondent she must be. I really don't blame her for how she reacts to his note at the end like damn, boy has some cheek. 

 

I just want to know morrreeeeeeeee! 

 

I want all the answers thank you very much! 

 

So... more please? Soon? 

 

D xx

 

Author's Response:

more is cominggggg

 

eventually

 

lol yeah the specific song inspo for this one already sets it up for tragedy

 

and also a villain origin story, which like, she's not necessarily a full villain but like definitely goes a lil dark in this fic

 

there's so much more coming with all these dynamics they're all vaguely falling apart which is just great *insert evil laugh*

 

also yeah james' note at the end was shit

 

answers will be coming!! i promise :P

 

thanks for reading <3333

Name: maraudertimes (Signed) · Date: 23 Apr 2020 03:59 AM · For: and that was the moment i knew

 

Can you recall that minion GIF where the minion looks around stunned and just says "What?!?!" That is currently me as of reading the last sentence and I'm very unhappy because no?!?! I don't want that to be the end?!?! Alright enough with my whining. Obviously I enjoy the marauders from time to time and you could even say that I'm a fan of Jily (OTP!!!!), but this blew me away.

 

The start was super cute and we got to see the super cute side of Jily and their relationship (and him calling her sunshine!), and I really enjoyed the attention to detail when it came to her outfit. I thought the call back to her calling him out on being *inappropriate* was super smart (and cute - everything in this part is cute!), and her friends asking her if she's trying to stun someone was both a great idea for a compliment and again, say it with me, super cute.

 

Another small part I really loved was Marlene's response to her being straight by retorting "heavily closeted" because it made that moment seem very real and definitely downplayed the whole "changed personalities in 3 mo" because it was obviously never a change of personality. Anyways, that part felt super important and I'm so glad that was included. (it was also super cute, dang it)

 

I also really enjoyed (well, I didn't like it but I appreciated it) how she tried to tough through it, because of course that's what you do, and how she really wasn't listening when she decided to interrupt (because of course that's what you do), the only area that felt off was that the girls weren't there when she rushed to the washroom, or at least mentioned that they gave her looks when she came back, but that might just be because in my experience women are entirely more perceptive. It didn't detract really, it was just the only area I felt was strange to me.

 

The ending was terrible though. Are you really going to end on that kind of cliff hanger? I jest, I'm just hurt. I really liked (ish) that James did at least send a letter to make sure she knew that nothing was wrong, he just didn't want to write her (or whatever reasoning you're giving him). I mean, it's heartbreaking but it really takes away the what ifs and leaves only the saddest ending, which while hauntingly beautiful is still hella heartbreaking.

 

Alright, please let me know when the next installment is up so I don't cry myself to sleep every night. Thanks!

Lo <3

 

P.S. I didn't realize I had to double space so I deleted and reposted this review because otherwise it was just a huge wall of text, sorry!

 

P.P.S. I forgot to add that this is for the Red/Gold POGS Special, I'm sorry for these issues, you're my first review in a few years so I'm a little rusty...

Author's Response:

honestly that minion gif is probably a pretty good take on this fic :P

 

there's definitely a lot of cuteness and optimism at the beginning, that was very intentional and also very mean of me because i knew all along that i was going to crush it by the end.

 

and yes, i love marlene and her response there. 

 

also lol so part of the fact that the girls weren't the ones to rush back there is because i'm obsessive and weird and needed this to match perfectly to the song it's inspired by, and therefore it had to be james' friends that went. although what happened in that sitting room is that *everyone* got up to go after lily, and it took a while for them all to realise that sending that many people after her was a bad idea and they should only go with one or two of them. and they ended up being james' closest friends because they could at least try to speak to james' behavior (or as much of it as they understand at this point, which isn't a lot - although sirius finds out a hell of a lot more about it right after this moment happens bc he more or less goes and yells at james the next morning, which is a detail that literally won't make an appearance until like chapter 18) and tell her that they were on her side.

 

but lol yesss, i absolutely had to end on that cliffhanger. i have "monster" in my forum title for a reason. :P (related to my previous point, james sends the letter because sirius makes him. which makes him sound like an asshole, so that's good.)

 

ahhh reading this ending is such a great lil throwback, flash forward one month later and you slammed out like 60 reviews in a month, how far you've come :P

Name: poppunkpadfoot (Signed) · Date: 16 Apr 2020 04:16 PM · For: and that was the moment i knew

hiiiii taylor, i'm here because i'm super excited to check this out, and also for rvg - team gold!

 

okay, so, knowing what i know about this au - which is admittedly not very much at all, but i do know a little - i have a very bad feeling about this right from the start of the chapter. lily has put all of this effort into looking stunning so she can knock james off his feet, but i have a straaaange feeling it's not going to pan out the way she wants it to. especially with the context that he hasn't been answering her letters. although she justifies that to herself, i would hardly call it a good sign.

 

i liked the scene with everyone showing up to the party, i thought it did a really good job of setting up all the different relationships lily has with this group of people. i'm not going to linger on it too much, but the marlene/dorcas is a yay from me. i love their banter (with each other and with lily).

 

i was almost surprised by the familiar way that lily was greeted by both remus and sirius - i don't know, i guess i usually picture her being a bit more distant from the marauders who aren't james - but it was a pleasant surprise. i was really into it and i particularly loved the image of sirius swinging her around hahaha. also, i was mildly disappointed to see that there was no sirius black/remus lupin tag on this, but then you filled me with hope with that cheeky little interaction between them, so... hopefully we'll get to see that develop in other instalments? <3 pretty please?

 

i had theories going into the party of what was going on with james that was causing him to not write back to lily, but by the time it actually got to the point where he had fully no-showed on them, all of those theories had been shattered! mostly due to what the other marauders had to say about james and what he's been up to all summer. like, i thought maybe his parents had died already by this point and he's just been super depressed? but then i definitely feel like someone would've thought to mention that, so i'm pretty sure i'm wrong - and therefore i have no idea what could possibly be causing james to behave this way, except for sirius's "sarcastic" theory that james is just too good for them now. but i really don't want that to be the case :( i really am so excited for more of this 'verse so i can learn what's going on.

 

i felt absolutely terrible for lily at the end there. on one hand i totally sympathize with and relate to the conclusions she comes to, that she's done opening herself up to people and is just going to somewhat close herself off. on the other hand, i kind of want to shake her and tell her that it's not worth closing yourself off from intimacy and softness just because a dumbass boy is being a dumbass! it's a bit ironic, even, because closing herself off like that because of james is actually giving james a hell of a lot of space in her psyche imo, even as she tells herself that she's going to forget about him totally and hides away all the photos of him.

 

you also gave her a wonderful little element of mystery with whatever she's doing for the order - i'm excited to learn more about that!

 

i do have one little... i guess i'll call it a sticking point, because i wouldn't really call it a critique at this point. i don't have all the information that you do about what's going on in this au (duh, obviously, lol) and i don't know if/how the relationship dynamics are different than in canon, but i did think that the other marauders - and sirius in particular, given how close i always picture him and james as being - had a much more understated reaction to james's absence than i was expecting? moreso that they seemed very nonchalant about hardly having seen him for months. i would sort of expect, again, sirius in particular to be quite put out about it, even if he knows more than lily does and knows that james has some valid reason for having fallen out of touch. but again, idk if maybe relationship dynamics are different here than i'm used to - you know much better than i do. i just wanted to give you that note.

 

overall - super fantastic work here, as always, taylor! you've definitely left me wanting much more of this au.

 

ttfn! <3

 

-kayla

Author's Response:

helloooooo

 

the ominous feeling at the start of this one-shot is correct haha

 

so yeah, i definitely picture lily being close with the other marauders, but specifically in the context of getting close with james. when she gets closer and closer to james, she also gets closer with the other boys, because of course they all come in a package. :P and i think she's got certain things she bonds with all of them on, so by the end of seventh year, they're fairly close. (although james is ultimately the glue)

 

the lil wolfstar hint there was a very intentionally dropped thing, there will be more on that later :P

 

hehe i'm so excited to drop all the layers of reasoning for what happened on this afternoon with james once we get to the actual fic (lowkey it takes like 20 chapters for the full story to come to light so i'm sorry for the massive delay on that lol)

 

YES okay that's something i really love that you picked up on, lily keeps telling herself she doesn't care about him and in the process is actually giving him a hell of a lot of space in her mind. that's a pretty common theme that'll show up in the novel as well - the amount of energy she expends on not liking him shows just how much he still matters to her whether she wants him to or not

 

ah ok so i have a slight explanation for this one, but i can't give away too much :P so sirius in particular has actually seen james a hell of a lot more than peter has, because they're basically brothers and james definitely hasn't cut himself off from his family. so peter's answer isn't necessarily reflective of all of them. but james' no-show for this party is definitely out-of-character even for them (some of their underwhelmed reaction is due to them realising lily's particularly put out about it and trying to not make a bigger deal out of it than she already has), and there will be some fallout from it, even though, once again, that won't get acknowledged for a while in the fic itself :P

 

thanks for reading/reviewing <3