FanficTalk Archive
Unleash Your Fandom
Hey!
I'm back for the fairyland event!
I love your first chapter so I thought I should check in the next piece in the puzzle. I thought it was interesting to get this from Scorpius pov. I like split narrative to be honest. I think it makes for a well rounded story and gives the author chance to show more skill at creating different characters. I think you've written Scorpius really well. interesting characterisation. He obviously has a lot of anxieties about himself and his place within the friendship group and society in general. I think seeing him develop throughout this is going to be so fun!
I thought it was very nice to get introduced to some of other characters that are important to the story. The informal wake seems happier somehow like sharing stories about the person was very played. Rose seems quiet in this chapter, I guess because Scorpius' POV. he doesn't know Rose well enough to be able to read her. There are a lot of potential in their dynamic, seeing the very early buds of that is exciting.
I love how you leave your chapters on like mini cliffhangers as such. you know how to interest your audience into wanting to read the next bit. I'm looking forward to seeing more from this story but it's bursting with potential!
Abbi xx
Hi there! I’m here for the review event.
I really enjoyed this first chapter. It was deliciously dark and did an excellent job of drawing me in and introducing everyone.
I really liked the way you depicted the relationship between Rose and Scorpius. I think “tolerate” is a great way that Rose used to describe it. You also did a great job gradually introducing backstory into the chapter.
You did a great job creating an atmosphere in this chapter. Everything seems very mysterious, especially Abel’s death, since he told Rose that he knew he was being followed. I like Rose’s lie about why she was attending the will reading, but I also find it interesting that his family doesn’t seem to know her if she was close friends with him for a long time.
You also did a great job with the will reading. I thought awarding the vast majority of the estate to a disappeared brother was a really good way to create tension and mystery (where on earth is he?) and now I need to come back to figure out how this goes.
This was really good and I’ll be back for more soon!
~Olivia
Hello!
It’s been a minute since I’ve caught up on this, but I’m still super into this story!!! The coat mystery continues and I love how you’ve integrated muggle (spy) tech into this fic with the tracker that Rose uses with her computer. It’s a fun blending of muggle & magical that also really enhances the options for not only Rose as a character but also for you as the author to incorporate other tech-y things. Hermione’s surprise visit jolted me out of sleepiness a bit too, not gonna lie :joy: You do a great job writing their complicated relationship and how that affects any interactions they have, no matter how brief and fraught with tension they are, like in this chapter. And now Rose has to go off to Diagon Alley to maybe find the owner of this all too important coat. You sure do like your cliffhangers :P Well done on this chapter, I’ll see you at a later one :)
~Madi
Fairy foxy review event
Hey! I’m here for the fairyland reviewing event, representing team snow fox!
And Rose even has her own office! And an assistant. I’m so proud of her, even though her office seems like a bit of a mess.
I wonder what’s so complicated about the Geronimo family. If I remember correctly, there are three siblings: Abel, Adam, and Anna. Abel’s dead, Adam’s missing, and Anna seems to be the only one left. I wonder if she has anything to do with her brothers going away.
How dare someone call Scorpius incompetent. Despite that, the Geronimo family seems to be more fond of him than they are of Rose. I wonder how her and Abel’s relationship fell apart, and what his family thought of her. It’s clear that Elizabeth likes Scorpius more than Rose, and it might have something to do with the breakup.
You are doing such a fantastic job of showing these complicated relationships, and I love all of it. Scorpius and Rose clearly have history, and I hope that we get to see bits and pieces of it over the course of the fic.
See you next time!
-A
Hey! I’m here for the fairyland reviewing event, representing team snow fox!
Oooh, Scorpius’ point of view! I have a soft spot for him, and I’m excited to see your take on him and his relationship with the Potter-Weasley clan.
And Lily Luna’s there! I actually ship Scorpius/Lily a bit more than I do Scorose, but I just really love Lily Luna so much. And they were in Potions Club together!
I know that this is right after a wake, but I’m glad that there’s some fluff in this story because I have a feeling that there are going to be some dark bits. And we get some characterization of not only the Potter-Weasley clan, but also Abel, who sounds like he was a very mischievous person. I wonder what his connection was to this group of friends.
Oh, Rose and Abel were a couple? Interesting. I wonder how that’s going to come up later…
And she was an Auror? Oh, this is getting even more and more interesting by the word, which I didn’t think possible.
I love the snark between Scorpius and Rose so much. I hope we get more snarkiness between them because I love the witty banter and snark between them, and now they’re in business together.
I love this so much, and I’ll be back soon! See you next time!
-A
Hey! I'm here for the fairyland reviewing event, representing the snow foxes!
I'm going to start this off by saying that I really like everyone's different take on Rose Granger-Weasley, and I don't think I've ever seen her as a private detective. I'm super excited to see how that works in the wizarding world.
I love your writing, which I know I've said before, but it needs to be said once again. Your descriptions are always so good, and pacing is always perfect in your fics. And, of course, I low-key ship Scorose, and I have a hunch that it's going to be in this fic.
Ooooh, a missing person?? I wonder how Rose knows Adam, and how this is going to play out. It’s clear that both Rose and Scorpius are very familiar with this family, and I wonder if the family is going to try to hide something from Rose while she’s investigating. I love mysteries, and I’m excited to read this one because it sounds like just my jam!
Like usual, this is a wonderful first chapter, and I'm excited to see where it goes next!
-A
Hey!
Here for fairyland reviewing event. Firstly, the simple blurb really draw me into wanting to find out a bit more about this story! I'm glad that I did, I love how your writing is full of such small details that really add this richness and fullness to your writing which I think is so good. There is so many different strands that you've set up in this first chapter, the death of Abel and the relationship with the black sleep brother is all very mysterious! It's caught my attention. It just seems like there is so much potential here.
I thought it was interesting how she described Scorpius. I don't really think that I've seen that done before. She seems pretty indifferent to him as a person. she is normally either best friends with him or in love with him from straight off the bat. I think changing that dynamic is really good and I can't wait to see how those feelings are going to play out. What role they're going to play to each other.
I'm super excited about this story now. I feel like you've nailed that balance between giving the audience information needed to set up but also holding back for the air of mystery. How is Rose is going to be dragged into this family issue? why did she break up with abel? who was following him? where is adam? so many questions! I'm looking forward to reading more!
Abbi xx
Author's Response:Hi Abbi!
Thank you for your wonderful review. Thanks for your compliments about my writing style, I very much appreciate that. I am so glad that the relationship between Rose and Scorpius is clear, and I hope that you continue to read to find out exactly what happened... :)
Thanks again!
blackballet
Oh, how interesting! For some reason it never occurred to me that Rose would see Scorpius as a suspect. I wonder why??
Great interaction between Hermione and Rose -- Hermione wants to be beloved and adored mum, but on her own schedule. Somehow I can really see this happening, particularly with an older Hermione who has all these things going on. Roser’s conflicted feelings are well represented here -- some genuine affection she has for her mum, and wanting her mum to actually be a mum, but also the resentment because of exactly that.
<3 Melanie
Ravenclaw
2020 HC Finale - Broom Racing
Oooh, exciting! She has a suspect to track! Curious to see where this endeavor takes her, and what she’ll discover along the way! I hope it’s Adam, but I’m wondering if he’s going to continue to prove himself elusive. As a wizard, it’s probably easy to pop just anywhere in the world without anyone knowing!
I was under the impression that Elizabeth was bluffing about knowing the whereabouts of her son! I wonder if that’ll be the case -- she just sounded slightly too blustery, at least to me, to be 100% truthful. And Victor! Was he going to accuse Elizabeth of cheating? That one of her sons is technically illegitimate? I’m a little suspicious about Abel now, too. His aversion to finding out the truth about his father makes me feel like he’s somehow involved in his own death, haha, though I don’t have any concrete reasons for thinking this.
The glimpse of Hermione at the end was a little heartbreaking. She seems like someone who really wants to be a good mother, but whose career prevents her from doing so. A lovely chapter!!
Eva
Ooh, the plot thickens. Rose has a good instinct to try to talk to Anna when she’s inebriated to see if there’s anything Anna is hiding. I’m so curious about the dynamics in this whole friend group with respect to Scorpius. Like does everybody know about his drinking problem? He seems to not drink in social settings, only alone? So I assume they know why? It’s really not a great environment for him, is it, all his friends getting wasted. Maybe that’s just a part of growing apart. I thought it was so interesting how Scorpius kept looking at Rose when she was drinking her wine, because I was never sure whether he was more interested in her or the alcohol! I don’t know whether that was your intention, but it seemed cleverly done!
<3 Melanie
Ravenclaw
2020 HC Finale - Broom Racing
I can’t believe I haven’t mentioned this yet, but I really really love the title of this fic! It’s a word that I’ve never heard before, and it looks so so interesting. I tried Googling it and it would only give me the Spanish definition, haha, so I’m really glad that you provided an explanation in your banner (which is gorgeous, by the way)! And, most wonderfully, it contains the word “Rose” in it. :D
I noticed that Rose has a “big-toothed smile” at the family reunion/birthday party! I can’t imagine her having any sort of smile, from the previous chapters -- she gives off this amazingly noir vibe, with her antihero-esque tendencies and her brusqueness -- and it does seem that having such a large smile is highly uncomfortable to her, which I completely empathize with haha. I like that she’s so consistent in personality; it’s a sign of good characterization!
Excuse me, Rose, you don’t joke about addiction! Where is your tact! I shouldn’t have been surprised that she keeps doing this to Scorpius, haha. :P It’s so in line with her character traits -- I mean, she planned on interrogating a drunk Anna! !!! Rose is scary hehe.
Really curious about that conversation between Elizabeth and Victor!
Eva
Rose’s physical relationship with Xavier seems like it could really help decrease stress haha. It was interesting to read about the way they have sex -- it says a lot about each of their personalities, and how it’s pleasurable but also kind of robotic (not in terms of the passion felt, but in terms of how they personally handle the post-sex time). It’s helpful to be able to just “scourgify” evidence of sex away, haha.
Nora is amazing. :P I admire her a great deal!
I’m really intrigued about Rose’s flashback, her concern about the left-hand vs. right-hand issue. I assume she’s referring to the way Abel’s father died, how he supposedly “committed suicide,” and I want so badly to learn more there. It honestly kind of sounds like Adam and Rose have a lot in common -- issues with their family name, unbelievable pressures from their parents, and these signs of logical thinking in times of crisis. I’m really curious to meet Adam and see what he’s like!
Eva
Hi again!!
I am SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS STORY!!! It’s extremely compelling, interesting, and each chapter varies with its settings and characters and content being covered, so it never feels like it’s stalling or just full of fluff material to fill space. This was quite an exciting chapter, and we see a lot of different things go down. It’s curious that Scorpius chose not to drink at the birthday party for Mariah, but clearly he’s got his reasons for doing so, and maybe we can find out more of those reasons later. His fixation on Rose the whole night was *chef’s kiss* perfection in the beginning stages of him realizing he might like her as more than a friend, and I was internally screaming the whole time, just as an FYI! Rose sneaking into the Geronimo manner after Scorpius has taken a very drunk Anna home and then hiding with him behind a curtain while some almost but not quite damning words are spoken between Victor and Mrs. Geronimo is very exciting and adrenaline-inducing. Ah, I could squee about this fic forever!!
~Madi
Broom Racing
Wow, look at Nora go, coming in clutch with all of that very useful information on the Geronimo’s family finances!! I love how she dances around the fact that the way she obtained such a large volume of information was less than legal, and that Rose notices it too. Nora’s heart is in the right place, and she just wants to please her boss, and I love her for that. I never realized how interesting reading about tax records and insurance claims could be, but in the context of a mystery I suppose everything is interesting :P The releasing of more information about Adam and his tenuous (at best) relationship with Abel, especially in the context of just after their father died, is certainly intriguing, and it answers my question from the last chapter about whether or not Rose knew Adam. :P I’m excited to see where this new thread takes Rose on her investigation!
~Madi
Broom Racing
I love how Rose’s character gets a little deeper by the chapter. She was an enigma to me when this story first started but I feel I’m getting such a stronger sense of her now.
Some people are very good at the sex scenes, and some are not so much, and you are really good at it! It suited the storyline, it added something, it was exciting and sensual, and it perfectly balanced the physical and emotional/mental aspects. I loved some of your turns of phrase there, like, “a cursory kiss, just glancing flesh,” and, “heart nearly palpitating off the edge of safety.”
I enjoyed the compare and contrast between Rose and Adam, why she sympathizes with him so much, being in the position of a firstborn who is pressured to follow in the footsteps of a parent, to do things out of a sense of duty. As well as the further explanation as to why Rose is not as close with her school friends anymore -- because it’s a part of her identity she’s trying to get away from, and so she clings to people who don’t associate her with that person she’s supposed to be.
The chapter ended on a curious and suspenseful note!
<3 Melanie
Ravenclaw
2020 HC Finale - Broom Racing
Oooh this is getting intense!! A change of setting, and we get to meet Auror Xavier Obourn, which is exciting. It adds another layer of complexity to the mystery, as Rose has to balance her desire to get to the bottom of Abel’s murder with the fun bonus of casual sex with Xavier and with his duties as an Auror and Ministry procedures all at once. I love that she uses another muggle device and puts it in the trench coat pocket in case someone comes back and wears that coat again. Xavier being a bit insatiable when he finds a moment to get his hands on Rose indicates he’s got some places that Rose can push and get more out of him than he consciously wants to, which is great. No sign of this brother Adam, though, and now I have a question -- has Rose ever met Adam? Would she know what he looks like now compared to a portrait of him from several years ago hanging in the Geronimo mansion? I can’t wait to continue unraveling this mystery alongside Rose and Scorpius! :)
~Madi
Broom Racing
Hi again!
Now we get to see Rose at home, and some great sibling interaction between her and Hugo, which is super great! I love the headcanon that Hugo becomes a Healer a lot for some reason, and that he uses a bit of his training on Rose but pulls back when he realizes she knows what he’s up to with that. The comment about Hermione having an issue with addiction as she was climbing the Ministry ladder and trying to push that all-important House Elf legislation is sad, but honestly? I think it’s a unique take on adult Hermione as Minister of Magic -- it gives her more depth, and colors the aging of Hugo & Rose too, somewhat. I’m excited to see how Rose talks with Nora about the case, and if Nora does in fact have some good insights on possibilities for leads and whatnot. Great work as usual!!
~Madi
Broom Racing
I’m back!
OKay I have to say first that “Requiem” from the Dear Evan Hansen soundtrack came on as I was reading this chapter so oof to those feels with the content of this chapter! Scorpius being an alcoholic basically as soon as he could legally drink is sad, and Rose not knowing what she can do to help him with it. This touch of Astoria’s study and all of the dusty books that clearly hadn’t been touched at all in the years since her passing was poignant, and made Scorpius’s drunkenness in the study that much more heartbreaking to read about. Rose not willing to leave him like this though, that shows the true loyalty that Abel showed her was different to unconditional loyalty, and hopefully is the foundations as to why her and Scorpius do have a good relationship, even if they bicker and whatnot constantly. And we now know who this Mr. Zampatori lawyer person is, and it makes sense why that would drive Scorpius to drink even more after meeting with him and Mrs. Geronimo. This puzzle keeps getting more and more confusing and interesting, and I love it!
~Madi
Broom Racing
Hello!
Whoooo more drama in this chapter, yessss! Rose is very strong-willed, much like her mother, and I also can relate to the angry tears problem that she has. Scorpius just letting her go upstairs because there’s no better alternative is probably most definitely going to bite him in the butt later, but oh well. Everything in due time, I suppose. Rose’s conversation with Anna is very enlightening, especially as it reveals more of Adam’s character at the same time. I enjoy the three kids all have “A” names, too, by the way. Of course Rose can’t get away from needing Scorpius for this case either -- what fun would that be? Very excited to see how helpful Anna is later on too, as she was relatively forthcoming during this exchange with information. I’ll be back soon!
~Madi
Broom Racing
Oooh, how did Rose know that Obourn would be here? Did they plan to visit together, or did she recognize his partner, Mott? I wish she wouldn’t be so dismissive of people questioning her, like she’s entitled to everything (after all, if she and the woman /are/ doing the same thing, then Rose is no better and shouldn’t act that way), but it’s still a really interesting flaw of hers! She and Obourn clearly have a bit of history together, haha, and I’m curious to know more about what it is!
I’m glad that she found the coat! It was really smart of her to bring trackers around; I know that if I were her, then I would not have thought that far ahead. :P Perhaps that’s why Rose is the investigator and I’m the reader, haha. I wonder whether Obourn would have thought to check the coats already -- it shows that people have been there, especially given the fact that most of them likely wouldn’t need coats when visiting the home. Though it seems as though he was more preoccupied with getting Rose into a separate room, which could have hindered his investigating capabilities a bit. :P
I hope the tracker gives her some good answers!! <3
Eva
I’m back for more!
Mrs. Geronimo is truly a piece of work, wow. This lawyer she’s hired, Mr. Zampatori, who is obviously not the family lawyer Rose dealt with after Mr. Geronimo’s death is curious indeed. Seeing Scorpius go all lawyerly is *heart eyes emoji* and also super well written -- I never do well trying to write legal procedural things, but he’s so short and to the point it makes me wonder how some lawyers can often wax poetic just because they want to, not because they’re good at their jobs. Rose realizing she didn’t actually know Lawyer!Scorpius and how that affects her perception of him is just perfect and I really hope that starts her building a different type of rapport with him soon, once she accepts he’s different at work than he is in his personal life. Also, that bit about Rose knowing Mrs. Geronimo *doesn’t* grieve is intriguing and clearly she’s got some explaining to do to Scorpius about that later. Agh, so great once again!
~Madi
Broom Racing
I thought the description of Abel’s still face (and his photographed face) as being cold and flat is so fitting -- photographs rarely capture the full liveliness of a person, and it would make sense that wizarding photographs are the same, even if they allow for moving pictures. And I think photographs of people will always hit differently once they’ve passed, so I really liked that you included this detail.
Hugo sounds so lovely!!! I am really glad that he came over to pester Rose about her mental health and her sense of obligations. He clearly understands her really well, even if they’re not the closest siblings anymore, and I’m actually really really thankful that he continued asking her questions and forcing her to talk. It’s something that not enough people do with their loved ones, I think, so perhaps his Healer training is paying off haha. (I wonder if that means that St. Mungo’s is finally focusing on mental health now, after the war?)
Oh, no, Hermione buckling under pressure is such a scary concept. She always seemed to actively seek pressure out -- thinking about the time she took a ridiculous number of classes as a third year, hahaha -- but I can understand things becoming too much even for her. I hope she gets through it. <3
I’m really glad Rose will go talk to Nora!!
Eva
Hello!
I really like this Nora character you’ve created as Rose’s assistant. She means well but is still trying to figure things out, bless her. Also she’s got a lot to learn if she’s going to be more covert and actually get into the field proper if she wants to listen in on other people’s conversations without being noticed, but that’s okay. She’s got the spirit and clearly good work ethic, so she’s good in my book. The bickering between Rose and Scorpius in her office is just so great and the dynamic it illustrates in contrast to their previous night was done so well! Rose trying to be discreet but also throw Scorpius off is peak Rose, and him being the sneaky lawyer he is towards the end of the chapter is also peak Scorpius. I love the little two-finger beckoning Rose does to Scorpius too at the end; it’s so bossy (word choice?) of her but I love it still. Great job!
~Madi
Broom Racing
Oh, no, Scorpius’s drinking habits make me really sad! I feel like callousness is definitely one of Rose’s concrete flaws as a person -- she seems to spend a great deal of this chapter mocking him or taunting him (perhaps good-naturedly, but either way without much tact), and then seems surprised when he reacts harshly. It’s a little scary to think that Scorpius has been drinking steadily since he became of age -- that’s a long time, and I’m worried for both his mind and his liver. Rose referenced his drinking problem before, and clearly she’s already somewhat familiar with it, but not enough to know what to do. I hope he can drag himself to sobriety at some point in his life! Addiction is a really awful state to be in.
It’s really interesting, learning that detail about the Greengrasses suing Draco. It explains a lot about Scorpius’s choice in career, and about his reverence towards his mother, who I wish was alive. She sounds like she was a very very cool woman. <3
I also hope that they can chase down Adam soon!
Eva
ANNA’S SMIRK AT THE END MAKES ME SO NERVOUS. I have so many questions about it -- was Rose able to witness it? Or did Anna only allow her smirk to return once Rose turned her back? Because this whole chapter was from Rose's point of view, I assumed at first that she saw Anna’s smirk, otherwise it wouldn’t have been mentioned. But after thinking about it further, the smirk just seems so so suspicious, to the point where I think the narration must’ve suddenly become omniscient and just showed Anna’s smirk to the readers.
Am I overthinking this smirk??? I just have a feeling that Anna could’ve invented an entirely new note to keep Adam safe, because she would’ve known that the note was slipped in after Abel’s death. Or perhaps that she’s even more sinisterly involved. I’m probably overthinking this smirk.
Rose’s way of talking to grieving people is so weird hahaha. She absolutely does not care about their feelings. It’s definitely one thing for Scorpius to directly and honestly address the claim that Elizabeth made about the will, and an entirely separate thing for Rose to ask to go through confidential records of the deceased. It’s really interesting seeing this cold and callous interpretation of Rose!
Eva
Any access or use of the FanficTalk Archive is conditioned upon compliance with our Site Guidelines and Terms of Service and the Copyright Policy and Privacy Policy contained therein. Should you have any questions about them, you are very welcome to contact any of our archive validators. For advanced searching, please click here.
Any characters, source code, text, or titles contained herein which are recognizable as copyrighted material are the sole property of their owners.