Name: Oregonian (Signed) · Date: 09 Mar 2024 04:33 PM · For: Chapter 1

What an exciting story!  And, after it's all over, so funny!  You have a perfect take on Miranda at seven years old, supremely confident that "nothing can go wrong," and her brother who, though older than Miranda, can't avoid being roped into this hare-brained adventure.

 

The supreme self-confidence that Miraanda shows here is a mark of her personality when we see her in her later years in the Moonlight series.  So it's all planned out?  They won't get caught?  No, she doesn't really know how to drive, despite what scant knowledge she might have picked up while watching her father drive as she rode along in the passenger's seat.  It looks so easy when the person doing it is experienced.

 

I'm impressed that Finn knew as much as he did about working the pedals so as to prevent their stalling the truck at every gear change, and I'm impressed that Miranda was able to get the truck into the gear she was aiming for at every shift change also.  But farm kids learn stuff fast, and often at an early age (a principle that I make use of in my present WIP also).

 

Too bad that the accidental magic departed from her just as they got into the pasture with the bull.  So what triggers it?  The exhilaration of driving the truck around at high speeds?  Apparently not the panic of being chased by an angry bull!  Maybe at that moment she was too panicked to think straight, even subconsciously.  We'll never know.

 

A lovely story, quite in character for the two kids.  But they really need to wait until their legs have grown longer to try driving again.  Maybe by then their father's anger will have cooled off!

 

A great glimpsse of a very young Miranda!

 

Vicki

 

Author's Response:

Thanj you for the review. 

That's the thing about accidental magic. You never know quite when it will pop up. 

Sorry, Miranda isn't going to wait until her legs grow longer--what is the fun in that?

Name: Noelle Zingarella (Signed) · Date: 12 Jul 2019 09:59 PM · For: Chapter 1

Hi Barbara! 

 

I know I’ve said it, but I’m going to say it again, I LOVE what you did with this story. You seriously nailed Miranda as a child AND you nailed Finn’s personality and their relationship. I find this especially impressive because Finn’s only been mentioned in passing in my story. He’s going to become a bigger character later, and you just nailed him and his dynamic with Miranda here perfectly.

 

I love that you took something that I mentioned off-hand and extrapolated this whole tale from it. The way that Finn is trying to be the voice of reason and stop Miranda from doing something crazy but how he gets roped into it because she’s so darn cute was so funny and spot on. He also seems to feel the need to help protect her during her shenanigans and I’m glad he’s there to do it.

 

Also, the side note that Miranda had tried to walk across the rafters of the barn and fallen and broken her leg is classic.

 

I loved your description of the truck and how Finn gets shoved under the dashboard. Their bickering was so funny and I particularly liked the part where Miranda was hanging out the window and Finn had to pull her back in before she fell out. And, of course, she’d be pouty about that because she just wants to have fun. I also adore that Miranda performed magic spontaneously to leap the truck over the fence.

 

Okay, the bit with the bull!! I wasn’t expecting that at all, and it’s so perfect and hilarious! I also love that the bull is named Ferdinand. The whole sequence introducing what had happened “Bull” and “S—-“ was so funny and unexpected, as was the chase through the fence into the barn.

 

The line “You’re a d—- girl bull yourself” is priceless.

 

I’m trembling myself when Pa comes home and is as scary as another bull himself. And  I like that the story ends there, leaving us to imagine the fallout from this adventure.

 

Thank you so much for writing this!! It’s just so funny and cute!

 

Yours,

Noelle.

Author's Response:

Noelle,

I am glad you liked it. I guess Finn's personality just made sense. It needed to balance out Miranda's, so he had to be a bit cautious but not Percy like or the adventure would never happen. I actually based it on two parts-one being Miranda's comment about the truck/barn. The bull was based on the tebow chapter. I thought that was hilarious so I melded to two ideas together. (Ferdinand, of course, is from the flower smelling bull in the cartoon.)

I wanted the story to be funny. No matter, what happens with Pa, it's not going to be funny, so I opted to leave it to your imagination. (At least we know they survived the punishment.)