Name: Ameripuff (Signed) · Date: 27 Feb 2022 07:28 PM · For: On Love

For the Galazy review

Poetry like this sucks, because it’s pure emotion and it looks like you had to live through it all again to put it on the page.  At the same time, it seems it was necessary.

Just like how when the asshat left, it made you realize things about yourself that you didn’t know.  You’re stronger and better without him - but it took him leaving to figure that out.   ‘You are now a lesson I needed to learn the hard way.’ It was necessary.

It’s as if all of the pain has forged you into who you are now.  Like iron becoming steel. That’s the other thing I took away from this - you’re setting an example for your daughter.  ‘Here is what is acceptable.’ ‘Here is what is not acceptable.’   You suffered to give her a better path and a better future.  It is necessary.

 

-Drew

Name: Crimson Quill (Signed) · Date: 27 Feb 2022 04:48 PM · For: On Love

 

hi tash - here for the galazy reviewing event :)

 

i know you said this is a bit of 'all over the place' as you called it but i think that's really helped with the pure and raw emotions in this piece. poetry doesn't always been to be polish or short. it is an expression of how you feel. i can feel the emotions in this piece and i'm glad that it's help you out from which sounds like a really tough time.

 

I love how I felt the mixture of emotions, the heartbreak but the angry streak in it. I thought the repeating was amazing done and helped really make the message from this piece stick with me. everything about this felt very brave. this loss really helped trigger this powerful revelation that this person is not worth your time. he isn't that person that you thought it was. that's heartbreaking but you come back stronger which I love so much. I hope it's okay that i'm using 'you' because this feels very personal and your authors note confirms it that. 

 

Abbi xx

 

Name: Helga's Helper (Anonymous) · Date: 27 Dec 2019 04:45 PM · For: On Love

Hello hello, and happiest holidays to whatever you celebrate, dear! ♥

 

Wow. This was a really powerful piece. It doesn't feel like being all over the place at all; I loved the structure that you used here.  The voice flows so well and my favorite thing about this is how confident you get as the poem goes on. It's truly heartbreaking when we realize the people we love never love us; and I can't imagine the pain when it's someone you've known for so long.  That makes it even more impossible to leave.

 

The writing here is so good. I love that you start with how things were, what the tipping point for this realization is. People really do show their true colors in other people's tragedies and I'm sorry that this person was a jerk.  But I love the strength that you got from this moment; thanking them for making you stronger and recognizing the kind of love you deserve is so wonderful and powerful. I'd imagine there's some true catharsis in writing this, and the voice and the confidence builds as you talk about what a man really is/what love really is.

 

I applaud you for posting this and showing true strength and vulnerablitiy in your writing. May your light continue to shine through and you find the love and happiness you deserve ♥

Name: toomanycurls (Signed) · Date: 17 Sep 2019 07:15 PM · For: On Love

Hi Tasha, 

I really love the narrative here. You use such powerful imagery and bold statements that you really stir up a lot of emotion. You do a great job showing how difficult it is to leave a toxic relationship and really see someone for what they are. The heartbreak through this is palatable. I really like how this ends with looking at what a future partner could bring. There's a great sense of symmetry with what the ex did and how he hurt but also a clear idea about what a future person will do instead and how they won't have the same pains aagain. 

Thank you for sharing this!

-Rose

Name: shadowkat678 (Signed) · Date: 16 Sep 2019 02:25 PM · For: On Love

Hi, Tasha!

 

Wow, this was a powerful piece. I'm sorry that you've had to go through so much, but I'm happy to see you working through it in your writing, and this really is some very strong writing. You're a very strong person. I can't say I'd ever fully understand what this is like, but the fact that you were able to still be writing about it and letting your feelings be known says a lot about who you are as a person.

I like how it's kinda grouped together topic to topic, yet it also kinda reads like a stream of thoughts. I think it makes it feel more true this way, like everything you're thinking comes out naturally, but as the same time it's readable and we're able to easily follow what you're saying.

 

This guy obviously doesn't know what he lost. Thank you for sharing what you wrote with us.

 

~Kat

Name: grumpy cat (Signed) · Date: 10 Sep 2019 07:37 PM · For: On Love

hey tasha, i'm here for the hc opener!

okay so first - i thought this was a really powerful piece of writing and i truly hope that it was cathartic for you to write, that it helped deal with your emotions as i know sometimes it helps me when i write stuff out. the message you weave throughout this poem is something you could give every woman on the planet to read and she should want to hear it because it is the way things should be - at least by the ending.


i found it really interesting that this is as much a poem as it is somewhat of a letter (maybe bad phrasing on my part) of you to the guy who hurt you, of you to yourself and of you to the world. and the way those three interweave is fascinating because together they create the powerful message of what it means to be loved and to love, what it means to be strong and how to become strong, and what it means to accept that some people aren't worth it and then be strong enough to walk away from them.


and then, in the individual parts we see the story shining through, the events, the incidents that happened and even if they're not described in detail, it's just enough that we can clearly picture it and see what happened. which i think shows real skill. (i also thought that it was interesting how you started it off with something fairly specific and then as we go along we get less details but somehow, the big picture becomes even clearer).

 

and even though you say this is all over the place, i wouldn't agree because to me, it reads like something raw and from the heart. it reads like something you could make into an empowerment anthem. so the fact that you manage to speak (write) about it exhibits the strength from the poem and i think that's really great.

kris

Name: Lacey Black (Signed) · Date: 20 Jul 2019 02:59 AM · For: On Love

Hey!

wow this was some seriously powerful writing. You described so many feelings inside you and emotions about things that have happened to you in such a way that drew emotion from me. You have such a way with words that can draw the reader to tears.  There were points where I could imagine your eading this to me yelling and cursing this ex of yours name. And you should be proud you walked away. Proud you stood up and decided you were better and I can feel in this that you are. 

I too feel a strong person can experience and grow from such things and you described that perfectly. And how someone weak and horrible enough to treat people like this are just basically dead trees in the road. Just something in the way unmoving unable to grow and flourish. This was wonderful. Amazing writing and you should be proud you wrote it. Proud you were able to stand up and say no this isn’t okay and I’m better than this and not only that but you then wrote about it for people to experience and learn and understand as well.

im assuming of course that when you say here you me I My etc that this is a poem based on you and your life. If I am wrong then I am sorry.

over all I am just enamoured by this and how well you articulated so many feelings an abused person would feel. Most victims cannot even express this it takes years and years of therapy for some to get to this point. Amazing. 

Great job hun

xo

Lex

Name: Oregonian (Signed) · Date: 20 May 2019 06:15 PM · For: On Love

Hi, Tasha,

 

I'm here for our review swap, and this looked like an important piece to comment on.  I was looking at your blog entries and just shaking my head at all the hard things that life has thrown at you recently and thinking that you must be one tough lady to experience all this and keep going.

 

This poem is just one more example of that.  You describe it as being "kind of all over the place," but your writing skill shows through, even in these turbulent times.  The poem is well organized, and although it is long, every line is unique, with new ideas to express, not just the same thoughts repeated over and over.

 

When I say "well organized", I mean that each general idea is explored within a group of several sentences clumped together, and then you move on to another concept that is similarly expanded and developed within a group of several sentences, so that it's really not random at all.

 

Your use of parallel constructions in the opening words of grouped lines ("I don't..., I won't miss...) gives the work a musical rhythm and makes it seem very poetic, not just prose.  It provides an organized way to include a lot of specific details within each concept.

 

In fact, the specificity of your many details is what gives this poem its power.  You begin with a specific incident, from which the reader can begin to deduce conclusions about this person, and then you continue to hold our interest by "proving your case" with so many concrete illustrations of your points that the reader cannot avoid continuing to read to the end.

 

But difficult and disturbing as the subject may be, your poem has an overall positive tone with phrases like "Thank you" and "I am worthy of love" and "a lesson I needed to learn the hard way."  So, surprisingly, it is not depressing to read, but rather it is hopeful and uplifting.  

 

I also like the image of installing a door in the wall of protection -- very vivid and apt.

 

I'd like to think that writing this poem, so plain and articulate and obviously well thought out, is a healing exercise that helps you, the poet, get a handle on everything that happened, put it in perspective, and move forward.  I wish you good fortune and an easier path in the future.

 

Thank you for writing.

 

Vicki

Name: Noelle Zingarella (Signed) · Date: 20 May 2019 04:31 AM · For: On Love

Hi Tasha! I’m here for our swap.

 

I want to start by saying that I really like how you laid this story out on the page/screen. The spaces between the sentences make it seem like a prose poem and give it a gravitas. I have to pay attention to it even before I’ve gotten far enough into it to realize how powerful the words are. 

 

And what powerful words they are too. The first three lines are an amazing set up to the rest of the story. First, everything is fine, we’re managing fine and then, something awful happens and we have this urge to call that person—that one person that we really want to be there for us—even though we know that he won’t be. That that hurts so bad; salt in the wound. I love how you juxtapose the uncaring response of the failed lover with the caring response of a new friend. And it’s a good question—how can the one be so caring and the other so uncaring? 

 

But after you lay out all this pain so beautifully, you turn it into a powerhouse of amazingly positive statements. I love the section where you state all the things that this person is done with—all the ways this person is finished being mistreated. But, even here, this person is fair to the failed lover—she points out the things that she will miss. And that makes the things that she won’t miss all the more affecting. There are so many more things that she won’t miss than that she will miss—and that tells me that she knows she’s made the right decision.

 

I love how balanced this piece is too. You’ve written out enough things that the failed lover has done well that it is totally understandable why she would have wanted to give him every chance in the world to get his act together. And then you take us into this litany about how his walking away was a positive thing—because it enabled her to find her strength and stand up and become much more amazing than she otherwise would have been.

 

I was cheering for her during this section about all the ways that he was a boy and not a man—they are so true and strong. And I really loved when those reasons segued into all of the things that make a real man. The ending is so moving and powerful too—she knows what she wants and, more importantly, she knows what she deserves. I believe that she will find it too.

 

I didn’t think this story was all over the place—I really liked how you set it up. It actually reminded me of a Litany of sorts and I loved the progression of it. I really admire how you took your pain and channeled it into this beautiful writing. Thank you for writing it—well done!

 

Yours,

Noelle

Name: Felpata_Lupin (Signed) · Date: 11 May 2019 11:32 AM · For: On Love

Hi, dear! I'm here for our swap!

Wow, this was quite powerful!

I can't say that I fully understand what you are feeling and what you are conveying here, because I don't have similar experiences, but I still feel for you and sending so much love and hugs your way!

It's terrible to realize that a person you trusted, you invested so much time and energy and love on, just takes you for granted, hurts you, belittles you...

And it's so painful to realize that you have been used and it's so painful to let go, but it's the only way to retrieve ourselves and start to heal... I suppose? I'm glad you found strenght in yourself again, even if it's hard!

And I really wish that you will find that man. The one who will love you for who you are, the one who will see you as an ally and not as a property, the one who will wipe away your tears...

I'm not sure if I'm making much sense with this review (reviewing poetry, especially when it's something so concrete and personal) is not easy. But just, know that this was very touching and the thoughts and emotions you expressed were very powerful and true. And also, you are very brave to share them like that! <3 <3 <3

Thank you for swapping and the hugest snowball hug ever rolling to you!

Chiara