Name: Oregonian (Signed) · Date: 21 May 2019 01:38 AM · For: A Snatcher's Past

Hi, Dark Whisper,

I was feeling hesitant when I began reading this story -- a Snatcher? Sirius Black's secret son? -- but you combined these elements in such a skillful and original way that I was hooked.  The two main characters, Trystan and Aurora, are very well characterized, not stereotypes at all.  

 

I liked that she gave him a challenge to grow up and want something serious, and I liked that under his Trouble-Maker exterior he took up her challenge and did better himself  One doesn't often see characters do that.

 

And then, after she badgered him into revealing his father's name, just to satisfy her parents' demand for that knowledge, she totally rejected Trystan in one horrible scene.  One doesn't often see a character in love do that.

 

Trystan's fleeing when he realized that Rita Skeeter, the school gossip, had overheard the conversation was completely believable, but another unexpected twist was that Aurora hunted down Rita in the library later and Obliviated her memory.  I am wondering who Aurora was protecting at that moment, Trystan or herself.

 

Your supporting actor, Vaden Sharpe, was also well drawn.  He was a good friend to Trystan at a time of crisis, and his friendship contrasted well with Aurora's rejection.  The pocket watch was a nice touch, first showing Vaden's generosity and then coming back in later years as a method for Trystan to repay Vaden's kindness.  The fact that Trystan never sold the watch, even when he was destitute, shows how much he valued Vaden's friendship.

 

I liked the ending of the failed-romance story, where you swiftly describe, believably, how Trystan got into the shady Snatcher business, later barely missed meeting his father, and saved his friend, while Aurora became the never-married Astronomy Professor.

 

Well written with a lively style, vigorous pace, realistic dialogue, good suspense, and seldom-used canon characters.  Nice job.

 

Vicki