Name: victoria_anne (Signed) · Date: 28 Feb 2018 08:48 AM · For: The Floods

Hello!

 

I think you've reviewed a few things of mine, so it's probably about time I got here! I haven't read Confounding Factors, though, so I hope that doesn't affect! It also means I'm not familiar with your usual style, but if it means anything, I really, really love the writing in this. 

 

I espeically love the language in the beginning, with the references to drowning. I think it all tied together really beautifully.

 

Ooh, so I don't know Sana or the relationship between her, Rose, and Lily (but obviously I can guess) but I'm really intrigued. It sounds like an intense relationship dynamic and I'm actually really curious to find out more.

 

For it to stand on it's own, I think you need to include more about Sana. I didn't really get much of her as a character from this story. I'm not quite sure what her father has to do with Rose.

 

Okay, I've just read that this is the first chapter of a larger story. I thought it was a one-shot, oops :P Which is good because it ending with me wanting more, so at least you know I'm excited to read on! My earlier points still stand, though. I'd like to know more about Sana and her situation in order to enjoy the story more. But there's plenty of room to explore that in later chapters, too, now that I know they'll be there! :P 

 

Anyway, I think you've done really well with this. Rose is the kind of firecracker that I love, and I can't wait to see what you do with Lily and Scorpius (and what is going on with him, hm?) The writing is gorgeous, so you totally don't need to worry about that! Good luck in the challenge <3