Name: magemadi (Signed) · Date: 12 Jul 2020 11:23 PM · For: Chapter 1

Hey Olivia!

 

First of all, ouch with those feels about a brokenhearted Scorpius Malfoy over a *married* Rose Weasley, ooooof! I can relate more than I thought I would with Scorpius feeling kind of like an automaton with waking up, going to work, getting paid, going to sleep, cycle and repeat what with quarantine still going on & me having been doing work from home since March, so shout out to Scorpius doing something to break his routine, even if it’s just making him feel worse. Even though this is a pretty short fic, you still capture a lot of time, per se, within the story, especially as it pertains to the time of Rose and Scorpius’s relationship that ended rather poorly for Scorpius. I am curious why Rose would show up at a seedy bar though, if that’s not a place she would typically go to. Was she looking for Scorpius or something? Did she want one last look at the man she used to love before going off on a trip to France with Teddy? Also I have to admit, never thought about Teddy/Rose as a ship, but now I may have to look into it. Great job, dear! :) 

 

~Madi

Broom Racing

Name: Renacera (Signed) · Date: 16 Sep 2017 05:33 PM · For: Chapter 1

Hello!

This is Renacerá from the forums (previously DarkRose/DracoFerret11 on HPFF!), here to review for you for the MAGIC House Cup activity!

This was a really nice one-shot! I'm personally a huge Scorbus shipper, but you sold me here on the emotions that Scorpius was feeling when he saw Rose again. Some thoughts:

In terms of characterization, I really liked both Scorpius and Rose in this story. This made me want to delve further into what Scorpius had experienced that led him to pull away from his friends. Being at the point where you don't talk to any of them anymore seems really striking. It made me wonder if the break from his friends coincided with the breakup with Rose. Rose herself seems to have her life together, but I wondered why she was meeting her husband in a seedy bar if everything was going well. The story posed questions that I was intrigued by as a reader, which I think is good!

In terms of emotional impact, I definitely think you portrayed how Scorpius isn't over Rose. I think there was an opportunity to show the awkwardness in seeing her again that may not have been fully realized, though. And I would have liked to dig even further into his embarassment and sadness as he left for the restroom to be alone.

Overall, this was nice! Good job!

Best,
Emily