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Name: ReillyJade (Signed) · Date: 12 Jul 2018 11:51 PM · For: Check

Hi, there! I'm stopping in for BvB :)

 

Yay... a missing moment! My favorite!!

 

This was gloomier than I expected it to be. I never expected to feel sorry for Cormac, yet here I am. Yes, he's arrogant, but he didn't deserve to be used in such a way. And that worst part is he knows exactly what Hermione's doing, but goes along with it anyway because he's still optimistic. Poor guy.

 

I really like how you handled Cormac's characterization throughout this piece, particularly in regards to where his attraction to Hermione comes from. There's he beauty and her brains, of course, but I like how he describes her as "a challenge." That's a very Gryffndor thing to say, and totally on-par with the Cormac we know from the books. I also appreciate how you kept him arrogant, but a bit more... likeable? I'm coming up short on the right word here but hopefully you get what I mean. You fleshed him out in such a short amount of words, and for that I applaud you.

 

There were a bunch of little, blink-and-you'll-miss-it things scattered throughout the story that really grounded it for me. Things like the mention of WWW products and how Hermione still thinks wizard's chess is barbaric. They're small things, but they help make the story truly feel like a missing moment.

 

Hmm. Could Hermione moving her king out of check be symbolic of the fact that this plan of hers to make Ron jealous isn't going to work out quite the way she wants it to? (At least not right away.)

 

Nice work with this! <3

 

Cheers,

Reilly

 



Name: Jayne Ostin (Anonymous) · Date: 14 Feb 2018 07:38 PM · For: Check

Hello, lovely Paula!

 

I am such a fan of missing moments. I didn't know coming into it that that's what this was going to be, so I loved it even more. It never occured to me to wonder how Hermione asked Cormac to Slughorn's party, but I think this is so perfect. 

 

Both characters are completely in, well, character. I love that Hermione would choose to ask Cormac over a game of chess. I think it's because it gives her time to come up with how to ask him, and if she ended up changing her mind then he'd be none the wiser. And I love how Cormac can see straight through her, and knows the real reason she's asking, but his arrogance still makes him say yes because he believes he still has a chance with her.

 

The ending is perfect. It's a great representation that the whole thing really is just a game to Cormac, and probably what appeals to him about Hermione is that she's a challenge, so I think it's such an awesome ending that she doesn't succumb to his check move.

 

Happy Valentine's!



Name: Rumpelstiltskin (Signed) · Date: 03 Dec 2017 02:18 AM · For: Check

Hello!

 

So this is super-sweet! I love Cormac's reaction, with Hermione have been completely avoiding him previously in combination with her extreme distaste for Wizards Chess (and then offering to play a game with him) and Hermione's overall shyness--it all worked extremely well together. His self-declared failure to flirt with her has obviously left him baffled. I also really loved that he attempted to egg her on a bit while she's clearly embarrassed, assuming that he'd say no or something to that effect, and then asking her to address him by his first name before he'd say yes. It's silly and sweet and it worked so well to make this piece fluffy and light. I also adore that he outright states that he intends to woo her at Slughorn's Christmas Party. It's also completely adorable that she's actually going to put effort into attempting to beat him in the chess game now, because, clearly, she was going easy on him!

 

This was a short, sweet little snapshot and I absolutely enjoyed it! 

 

-Rumpel



Name: forever_dreaming (Signed) · Date: 16 Aug 2017 03:56 PM · For: Check

Hi :D I'm back, again, to keep spamming you with reviews because I simply adore your writing! This fic is no exception.

I think that the movies portrayed McLaggen (and lots of other characters) very unfairly, and the books were not much kinder to him. I liked that you sort of turned that characterisation of McLaggen as a show-off flirt on its head and humanised him a little—but still kept him in-character. For example, I like that you made him attracted to Hermione because she was clever, beautiful, arrogant, and a challenge--I see that part of Cormac's attraction to her is for her traits (cleverness and beauty), but a large part of it is also male ego (hence that he likes that she was a challenge). No can deny that he is arrogant, that was simply how he was characterised in the books and you certainly adhered to that, but it was also very creative that you extended upon that characterisation because he isn't just arrogant. He's also really freaking cute. Argh. Cormac in this fic was quite likable, which makes me a little mad because I don't have room in my heart for another fictional crush!

I actually sort of shipped Cormac and Hermione after this :D Especially after the "the smile she was giving him felt like a hard earned victory" (That to me is a really Gryffindor thing to say, by the way, which was a nice addition) and the "her surprised laugh was the bst thing he'd heard in years" (SO CHEESY BUT SO CUTE). Argh. I'm not supposed to get more ships to be obsessed with. 

As cute and heartbreakingly fluffy as always. Loved it! <3 



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